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ᴛʜᴇ ᴍᴏᴅᴛᴇᴀᴍ ᴏғ ʜᴀᴅʀɪᴇʟ ([personal profile] hadrielmods) wrote in [community profile] dankmemes2015-11-21 12:03 pm
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Test Drive Meme #3

Welcome to Hadriel's test drive, and thank you again for your interest in the game! As always, our reserves page is here, and our applications page is here! Reserves open November 24th, and apps are open December 1st.

Two quick points here as well:
1. Any thread made in Hadriel's test drive will be accepted as the sole Action Log sample in the application.
2. All threads made in the test drive can be considered game canon!

Test drives will be broken up into specific god mini-events, during which your characters can see how well they fare under the watchful eye of one of the gods. Choose wisely or just simply pick 'em all, and have fun!





F E A R

SCENARIO ONE: GIMME A HUG
[The Door brings in all that is chaotic and evil in the world. This may include you, may include the person next to you... and may include the monster behind you.

Watch out as you explore the streets of Hadriel, because you're not alone, and there's always something on the rooftops watching and waiting for the perfect opportunity to separate you from your group and tear you into pieces. This time, the Door has brought in a large slithering beast for you meet.

This Titanoboa is not the friendliest of snakes. Over fifty feet long, it requires quite a lot of meals in order to keep going, and it seems to be most interested in making you one of them. A giant anaconda, this is a constrictor rather than a venomous snake - but don't worry. It's got teeth, too, in case it needs to do a touch of nibbling. We're sure you'll get along just fine.]



SCENARIO TWO: THE DOCTOR IS IN
[You awaken on an operating table. How did you get here? What's going on? You don't remember checking into a hospital or seeing a doctor, and when you try to get up you quickly discover that your hands and legs are secured tightly to the table, the straps digging into your skin.

Next to the table is a tray of gleaming steel surgical instruments, their sharp blades glittering as the overhead light flickers. They seem to be the only clean thing in the room, as you begin to realize that the walls of this operating room are moldy and stained, and there's something dripping from the ceiling. This may not be a legitimate hospital at all.

There are footsteps outside the door. It could be a friend - or not. Will you call for help? Try to free yourself? Lay back and wait for the doctor to arrive?]



H O P E

SCENARIO THREE: HOPESGIVING
[You find yourself in a kitschy, brightly lit, utterly pleasant gift shop. Lining the shelves are all manner of stuffed animals, inspirational figurines, greeting cards, and delightful ornaments. Some even look familiar, like something you might have seen before.

The door isn't locked. You can just leave, if you want. But on a pedestal where the registers should be is a globe of glittering light, and within it, a picture of the person you care for most in the world. Carved on the pedestal are the words Bring someone hope, and you will bring them happiness.

Of course, you aren't alone in there. Will you find something on the shelves to show to your companion, something that might bring them hope? Or maybe you brought something from home. Or maybe you don't care at all, and just want to smash everything in there. It's all up to you.

This is a simplified version of this month's Hope event.]
recinerate: (let's exchange the experience)

beyond birthday (crau) | death note: another note

[personal profile] recinerate 2015-11-21 09:07 pm (UTC)(link)
scenario two.

Beyond wakes, strapped to a table, and he can tell it's been a while since he was last awake. Everything is painful and new, like his body has forgotten what it's like to be alive, and since the last thing he remembers is being murdered at the hands of a girl with weaponized blood and unnatural strength - well. It's not difficult to put the pieces together, solve the puzzle for a complete picture. He was dead; now he's not. (Again.)

But this isn't the Barge infirmary; he knows that much, at first glance. This place is filthy, an undercurrent of menace running through everything inside the room, the way the operating instruments are placed, the inconstant light blinking overhead. He turns his head toward the sound of footsteps outside the door.

"Who's there?" His voice is quiet, raspy from disuse, but it still rings through the silence louder than he expects.

scenario three.

Beyond inspects each object inside the shop with a agonizing attention to detail, the sort of keen interest that most ordinary shopkeepers would attribute to intent toward shoplifting or some other sort of criminal activity. This is no ordinary shop, of course; his unnerving quietness goes, for the most part, unnoticed.

He does finally turn to the person nearby after reading the words on the brightly lit pedestal, his voice even and calm: "Does hope need to be gift-wrapped as well?" He could be serious; he could be sarcastic. It's difficult to say.

yaha | drakengard 2

[personal profile] barebacking 2015-11-21 09:10 pm (UTC)(link)
SCENARIO THREE: HOPE

[ Yaha can honestly say that he's confused. He did not expect himself to be in a shop -- and one absent of its shopkeep. The elf thinks that he would be somewhere with a lot more fire.

He wanders through, looking at the objects on the shelf, with befuddlement. It is only when he notices the globe on the pedestal does he stop his aimless wandering. His eyebrows come together as he steps forward -- tilting his head a little so that he could catch a glimpse of what is inside at a "safe distance." But it is only when he sees what is within that he rushes forward. His hands gloss over the globe as he breathes heavily upon it until the outside fogs.

Urick. The elf looks to read what is carved. His hands immediately drop away from the globe. ]
Hope?

You do not bring someone happiness with hope. [ Pulling away, he walks towards the object in the shop. How did the shopkeep know? How? Is it a test? What an unfortunate test that it is. Because the elf understands the truth of "hope." Fill a person with it and it's worse than any poison that you could give.

He starts to grab various items off of the shelves to smash them on the floor. ]
Let's see if we can bring the shopkeep forward, hm? [ His voice remains calm, lilting as it always does, even as he starts to rip the stuffed animals apart. ]
Edited 2015-11-21 21:12 (UTC)
lethen: (pic#8905006)

fenris | dragon age

[personal profile] lethen 2015-11-21 09:44 pm (UTC)(link)
2 | fear

[The disorientation of consciousness comes with a painful headache, sharp behind his eyes, intermittently pulsing. When he recovers enough to look up, he's blinded by the flicker of an overhead light, grimacing and turning his head away. He closes his eyes, seeing only bright spots. His cheek presses against something stiff and cold. It has a strange texture that reminds him of leather.

After a long moment, Fenris forces his gaze back on his surroundings. Everything is alien and unfamiliar. The nightmarish quality of the room comes with its own sense of nostalgia - there's an awful taste like metal on his tongue. He's never been here before, but it feels like it. The panicked churning of his gut only makes it harder to concentrate on getting out.

His wrists and ankles are bound. He strains against them, lyrium flaring in the dimness, but he's not focused enough to fade through it. His thoughts are all slurred and loose, slippery in his mind. Was he drugged? Blinking to clear the fog, Fenris rolls his upper body up, head bent forward, eying the tight straps as if to determine whether his teeth will be able to get through it.

At the sound, he goes rigid, eyes narrowed to slits.]


Show yourself.

3 | hope

[There isn't much in the shop that he recognizes, an otherworldly strangeness to the items lined on shelves. It feels more like a dream than anything real. He pauses to eye an assortment of small animal toys, brow arched. He's more wary than calmed by the brightly decorated atmosphere.]

What is the point of this?

[Fenris says it aloud, irritation coloring his tone. When he turns, it's as though he's noticed his companion for the first time, his glance uncertain.]

Are we meant to purchase these useless items?
littlesoul: (Default)

River Tam | Firefly

[personal profile] littlesoul 2015-11-21 11:02 pm (UTC)(link)
[I'm taking River from right before her box is opened in the pilot ep, if anyone is curious, so she's basically going from one horrible place to another. *is awful*]

[Scenario 2]
River wakes slowly, her mind groggy and confused and her body uncooperative when she tries to move it. She doesn't remember what she was doing before the cold set in but she knows she wasn't here.

She tugs at the binds around her arms and legs once, twice, but they don't budge. She's trying to panic but her body still feels heavy and filled with lead, everything is thick and hard to move in.

There's a noise outside the door, someone coming, and that jars her into enough of a state that she's tensing up despite how slow she feels. Her eyes dart from the door to the weapons and back again.

Her hands twitch just a little, anticipation building in her chest as she waits to see who might be beind behind the door.
justscience: (solemn)

Re: River Tam | Firefly

[personal profile] justscience 2015-11-21 11:14 pm (UTC)(link)
Chris isn't sure how he got here. The last he remembers he was walking -- no, stumbling to the gates of the township, the zombie virus taking the last of him, weak and delirious. He doesn't feel weak anymore, but he must be still delirious. He's never been to a place like this. These places only exist in horror movies. Then again, he used to think that zombies existed only in horror movies, too.

He's trying to figure out exactly where he is, opening doors, looking for clues. That sort of thing. Most of the rooms have. Turned up empty, the occasional have had corpses, but he's a little surprised to find someone in this one. A young girl, no less.

"Excuse me, miss?" He looks pointedly at the restraints. "Would you like some help with those?"

Enjolras | Les Miserables

[personal profile] bloodofapollo 2015-11-21 11:36 pm (UTC)(link)
un.
[ Funny thing is, Enjolras doesn't even remember hitting the ground. The army was good at their job, he supposed, and he died before ever hitting the streets of Paris. He must be on the streets of purgatory now, he reasons. It's dark, drab, and there's a definite chill in the air. Maybe this place is supposed to freeze out all your sins instead of burning them away.

He strides through the streets calmly, not really expecting to find anything. He vaguely wonders if he'll see any of the other Les Amis here. There's a decent enough chance. Grantaire's probably gone to hell, and Marius could probably get straight into heaven if he tried, but someone is bound to show up here, right? Revolution spares no one.

But maybe purgatory is solitary. That's okay, too.

He knows he isn't alone when he turns the corner and sees the largest snake imaginable. It hisses, bares its fangs, and Enjolras knows this is no purgatory. This is hell.

He turns on his heels, and runs. ]


trois.
[ Enjolras doesn't know why he's even in this shop. He's never been one for frilly, kitschy accessories, needless trinkets that serve merely as distractions and a way to placate the masses. He's always strived towards loftier goals, and besides, the idea of so much excess while others are starving repulses him. It's curious though, this shop. There are things he recognizes, and several things he doesn't, candies and plush things and toys that must be from other cities, other nations.

He doesn't take anything. He's too cautious for that, and besides, Enjolras does not steal for no reason. This shop must have a proprietor, and he doesn't want to cheat them out of their living. He makes his way through the shop slowly, carefully, peacefully. That peace is shattered when he sees the podium.

Grantaire.

It is only now that he acutely realizes what he's lost, what he's missing.

He reaches for the globe slowly, tentatively, lost. How does one bring the dead hope? ]
caelus: made by chatona for me dnt (Default)

james t. kirk • star trek (aos)

[personal profile] caelus 2015-11-21 11:50 pm (UTC)(link)
SCENARIO THREE: HOPESGIVING

[ jim isn't exactly sure how he'd gotten here. scratch that, he's got an idea, but he's pretty sure that this place wasn't the place that he was just looking in on risa. it had been a quick stop, everyone needed a break after the last few months, and the crew was eager to get some time planetside.

while he wasn't a stranger to the resort scene, it was midday, and he wanted to see what else the planet had to offer. he'd found a small market just off one of the main beaches, and headed in, spock and bones trailing behind. bones had veered off their path to look at something for joanna, and spock kept just a few paces behind his captain. jim had seen the gift shop, full of atypical trinkets, and mentioned something about stopping in.

spock had said something supremely logical about it being a waste of time, to which jim asked "even when it comes to picking up something for uhura", but it didn't seem to work. he told his first officer he'd be right back and as soon as he walked in the din that he'd grown used to outside was gone.

so was spock. bones too. what the---?

he groaned and pulled out his communicator, all the while continuing to peruse the shelves, they were explorers after all. once he flipped his communicator open: ]


Kirk to Spock. Uh, I think something happened, maybe I lost you guys back there. Do you read me?

[ nothing. huh. jim keeps making his way through the shop, small satchel bag slung over his shoulder, and tugs his jacket closer, hand going into his pocket to find his command rank insignia pin that he keeps there. he tries changing frequencies manually, but he's still not getting anything from spock or bones.

that's when he sees the counter and the globe. there's other people in here, but he's distracted by that globe. is that---? he moves over to it and picks up the globe. the enterprise is there, shining against a backdrop of stars. his ship. his crew. everything he cares about in the universe, that gives him hope and makes him want to put on the uniform every day.

he gently sets the globe down, and shakes himself slightly: ]


Kirk to Enterprise, is anyone reading me at all?
littlesoul: (Default)

[personal profile] littlesoul 2015-11-22 12:08 am (UTC)(link)
Her eyes are trained on him as soon as the door opens, hr expression panicked. When he doesn't seem to know what she's doing there, it offers a little comfort but not much.

"Help?" She nods, wriggling her hands a little in a feeble attempt to free herself on her own.

"Got lost, not supposed to be here. Woke up and everything was different. Wrong." She speaks slowly, her voice a little slurred like she's still trying to wake all the way, or recover from having been drugged by something.
twincurses: ({smile} closed book)

Fai D Fluorite | Tsubasa: Reservoir Chronicle

[personal profile] twincurses 2015-11-22 12:55 am (UTC)(link)
SCENARIO TWO: THE DOCTOR IS IN

[As waking up goes, it’s not the worst experience Fai’s ever had, but it’s close enough. The bindings and ‘medical’ equipment are fear-inducing on their own. However, it’s the solitude that worries him the most. The escape from Lecourt had been chaotic, but they’d all still been together. Now, there’s no sign of anyone at all. Which, if this place is as bad as it seems, may be blessing. There are many things, in many worlds, that the children should never be subjected to. Whatever this is? Is likely one of them.

He tests the bonds for a moment, before relaxing. It’s clear that strength isn’t going to break them - at least, not his strength. Magic’s not an option (is never an option). And that rule’s been broken more than enough for today. If only he-

The footsteps coming closer put an abrupt halt to any thoughts of escape. For a moment, he just waits. Until finally, the door starts to open.]


Ah, does that make you the doctor?

[Someone observant enough can probably catch the worry and hint of fear in his smile. It’s still awfully carefree, given the situation.]

SCENARIO THREE: HOPESGIVING

[Now this is much better! Fai's not what you'd call a 'hopeful' person, generally, but he's certainly good at acting like it. He's content to skip around the gift shop - oohing and ahhing over various little trinkets. If he seems to be avoiding looking too long at the globe itself, well...who can tell? At some point during this, he's coming up to you. Yes, you!]


Hello~ I need a second opinion!

[Without giving time to respond, he presents his new, hopefully willing assistant with two small stuffed...toys? Key chains? Who knows! In his right hand, there's this one. In the left hand, it's a similar one, vaguely resembling the 'little kitty' shown here.]

Which one brings you more 'hope'?
lethen: (pic#9473253)

[personal profile] lethen 2015-11-22 01:28 am (UTC)(link)
[The shop is large enough that if he wanted, he could ignore the other elf in it completely (and he can tell it's an elf by those tapered ears, long and pointed). While he maintains a healthy distance, a mixture of suspicion and wary interest keep his eyes on the stranger.

Fenris says nothing when the elf begins speaking, although his brow draws tight with confusion at the words. He hasn't approached the globe himself; there's something unusual about it that makes him stay away. He would not be surprised if magic is at work here.

Glass shatters across the floor, causing him to start forward, body tense.]


What are you doing? [He doesn't ask out of concern for the shop's wares. He watches the elf tear apart a small stuffed rabbit with bewilderment.] Although I suppose it's an effective method, if you're seeking an angry merchant.
justscience: (neutral)

[personal profile] justscience 2015-11-22 01:30 am (UTC)(link)
He nods, taking that as permission, and gets to work on her restraints. Her story, as disjointed as it is, makes sense. It's rather similar to his own.

"There's definitely something off about this place," he says, giving her a wan smile, the kind he used to give his daughter. "Maybe it's the blood and the mold. But at least there aren't any zombies." He undoes the last of the restraints and steps back slightly. "Can you stand?" She doesn't look to be all there, but he wants to give her the benefit of the doubt.

[personal profile] barebacking 2015-11-22 01:37 am (UTC)(link)
And another elf?

[ His shoulders drop just a little as he holds a few ornaments in his hands, prepared to dash them across the floor too. He did not notice this one and he drops what he is holding. They break as they wont to do, but this time not by his own desires. ]

I do wish to see an angry merchant, because there is no such thing as bringing hope to anyone. [ He tilts his head just a little as he steps forward, over the broken pieces. ] Even seeing you is not a hopeful sight. Do you know how long it has been since I've seen another elf? Why do they bring you before me now?

[ If he were younger, even three years younger, he may have taken so much heart in knowing he was not alone. But now, it means little to him to see another elf. No, that's not true either. There's a lot happening. A lot to hold. A lot to wish for. But most he wishes everything to be bathed in red so that he can find his calm. ]

What is your name?
lethen: (pic#8904997)

[personal profile] lethen 2015-11-22 01:56 am (UTC)(link)
[At the unexpected approach, Fenris takes his own steps backward, suspicion climbing. He bristles at the attention - he knows he may be an uncommon elf himself, but city elves or Dalish elves, slaves or servants... they're not rare.]

I doubt I was meant to be a hopeful sight.

[There's a touch of sarcasm in it. Why would his presence be hopeful to another elf? It makes no sense, nor does anything he's seen so far.]

And I couldn't know that. Elves aren't unusual.

[He takes care not to step on any glass pieces with bare feet. At least he's armed, although he senses no threat yet.]

My name is Fenris. Who are you?

[personal profile] barebacking 2015-11-22 02:00 am (UTC)(link)
Elves aren't unusual to you?

[ He repeats the phrase carefully. ] What a beautiful world that you must live in. While you do not see yourself as a hopeful sight, you bring ... you bring words I did not expect to ever hear.

[ His head tilts to the side, letting his hair cascade down over his face. ] I am Lieutenant Yaha. For what little that title means now. [ A beat. ] No, it means everything. How odd I must sound to you... but we should never forget ourselves, Fenris. We should never forget what we have gathered in our hands to be ours. And that title is mine.

[ Another turn of his head so that he no longer is looking through his hair as he smiles. ] What is it that you have here that is yours?
64th: I'm definitely going to die alone and work is all I have. (Not to overstate; but -)

[personal profile] 64th 2015-11-22 02:02 am (UTC)(link)
[ Cashmere is not very impressed with whatever the hell it is the gods are doing here, but she does like all the trinkets and interesting odds and ends. some of it looks like it might even be useful, so she's playing along with it all for now.

not everyone seems so settled about it, though, and she glances over at the unfamiliar man who seems to be talking to... himself? some sort of weird cell phone? his confusion is not really her problem but he does seem lost (and handsome, which is to his favor), so she pockets the necklace she's been holding (Gloss's token from his games) and call over to him from down the aisle. ]


If you brought your cell phone from home, it won't work here. Not without the right chip.
lethen: (pic#9259232)

[personal profile] lethen 2015-11-22 02:21 am (UTC)(link)
[A Lieutenant? That sits strangely with him, and it shows on his face in a brief flicker of uncertainty. It's not a title he would have imagined for an elf. Still, he can't help a flare of bitter resentment.]

A beautiful world in which elves are commonly enslaved by those power-hungry and corrupt. [And if lucky enough to avoid that fate, then go on to face oppression in the south regardless.] Is that what you wished to hear? Do not speak to me with familiarity. I care little for the plight of other elves. We are not the same.

[He considers whether he's going to answer, glancing away, expression dark.]

What I have here is freedom. It won't be taken from me.

[personal profile] barebacking 2015-11-22 02:31 am (UTC)(link)
Enslaved? [ Is it the fate of their race to always suffer? Is that what meaning their lives must have? ] No... I wished to hear that they were happy and well. But I believe that would only happen if all humans were dead. It is humans that are torturing us so, isn't it? Of course, it always is them. [ His voice returns to the same lilting tone of before as he starts to smile sweetly. ]

I see. I would not take that freedom from you, Fenris. We may not be the same, and I will not burden you anymore with my troubles. The suffering of an elf... I do not wish to see that. [ He starts to laugh which probably takes away from his words. ] Ah, forgive me. It's just... no matter how unhappy that you are, how much you may detest me for my familiarity... I am suddenly finding the hope in our situation.

[ And is that not what the shopkeep desired? ]
lethen: (pic#9752330)

[personal profile] lethen 2015-11-22 02:49 am (UTC)(link)
It is the fault of mages more than humans. The affliction of magic is not prejudiced. Any mage can become corrupt. [At least in his own eyes, although humans are the dominant race of Thedas.] They will always seek more power.

[The tone is unsettling. It doesn't match the words that are said, and Yaha's laugh has him bristling. No matter what he's assured, he remains guarded.]

And what of your elves? Is it the same?

[He tells himself he won't be surprised of the answer.]
littlesoul: (pic#)

[personal profile] littlesoul 2015-11-22 02:49 am (UTC)(link)
She sits up, rubbing her wrists and looking around them once again. He eyes squeeze shut for a moment, and she takes in a breath before opening them again.

Still here. Not back in Hell the Academy. Not anywhere. At least not anywhere she knows.

So it could be real? Maybe? Or something else, a game. A trik. Something to be beaten..

But the man before her doesn't seem to eb a part of it looking just as uncertain as she feels. That's both comforting and disturbing as anything else. If they don't know the game they're playing, how can either of them win?

She moves carefully, putting bare feet down against the floor. She's only wearing a hospital gown, something she thinks was put on her when she arrived here and it moves against her skin in a way that makes her want to twitch.

"We should get far." she says, her voice still a bit slow. "Get out while we can."

[personal profile] barebacking 2015-11-22 02:53 am (UTC)(link)
[ His smile fades. Oh, dear. It seems it would be best not to show Fenris that he is a mage. Yaha does his best to appear scandalized at the thought of those with magic. ] What awful beings!

[ Says the elf who uses the blood and screams of the tortured in some of his spells. ] What of my elves? They're dead. I'm all that is left. An army came ... they understood our power and wiped every last one of them out. Oh, no... that's ... there may be those scattered to the winds, but on all accounts, they are a dead race in my world.
lethen: (pic#9705519)

[personal profile] lethen 2015-11-22 03:03 am (UTC)(link)
[Best keep the blood magic a secret as long as possible, unless Yaha wants an extremely unpleasant reaction. As it is now, the agreement has him somewhat calming from his prickly caution.]

Our realities may not be so different. It's believed elves were once more plentiful than any other race, but they were overtaken by the invasion of humans and forcefully enslaved. [History isn't his highest interest. He doesn't care for what may have happened in the past; it doesn't change the present.] You managed to survive. How?

[personal profile] barebacking 2015-11-22 03:09 am (UTC)(link)
I ...

[ Yaha lightly shakes his head at his dear new companion. To have another elf hear, somehow he is not certain that he could bear it. To be looked down upon, to be hated by something that he did not think he would ever see once again. Who knew that he could feel shame? ]

I do not know if that is something I could have you hear, Fenris. It may color your view of me and ... I want you to look upon me positively. You're the first elf I have seen in almost twenty years. Let's not ruin it with what is the past and what we've done to live to this point.
lethen: (pic#9705520)

[personal profile] lethen 2015-11-22 03:21 am (UTC)(link)
[What is that supposed to mean? Fenris looks at him oddly, expression tinged with more suspicion, although a part of him responds to the sentiment. Moving on from the past... isn't that what he's striven to do in these last several years? And is still struggling against each day. He looks down at his feet, mouth pressed in a tight line.]

You care a great deal for my opinion simply because I am an elf, and I won't claim to understand that. But I will not make you tell me. There are a number of things I would rather not share of my own past.

[Things he was made to do, emotions he was made to feel. He's familiar with shame.]

Though I imagine this place cares little for what we want.

[personal profile] barebacking 2015-11-22 03:32 am (UTC)(link)
And yet, how is that any different from where we have come? We have our freedom and [ -- our magic -- ] our lives! But we are still in a world that cares little of our wants.

So, let us do our best to ensure that our time here is one where we are beneath no boot and strive to hold a place where no one will make us feel weak. Does that not sound like a wonderful goal, Fenris? [ Oh, Yaha, did you forget just a few minutes ago about mages who seek out power? But this is different, isn't it? It's so different!

Because Fenris doesn't know.

He steps forward with a bright smile to reach out to take his dear friend's hands. Who cares if he is being too familiar? He's stepped away from talking on his past and now can talk of a future. A future where the streets and walls will be bathed in blood! Isn't that what they're both talking about? ]
Look, do you see? Do you see the hope that I've found in you?
deadmeat: (pic#7177982)

[personal profile] deadmeat 2015-11-22 07:24 am (UTC)(link)
[There's nobody in the world he cares for most. There's no draw to stay in the shop for the biker, and he'd decided to leave. But not before smoking the last of his Lucky Strikes, leaned against the windows of the hokey little shop.

He's almost done after minutes pass by, flipping his helmet back down as the cig burns to the filter. That's when he hears the shattering, the clinking of things being tossed. The biker glances over his shoulder to look at what might be causing the ruckus. Flicking the smoldering stub he has left to the ground he stares. There's-- someone looking like a shitty David Lee Roth impersonator breaking things.

This is funny. Funny enough to step back in, maybe dinging a little bell on the door.]


That works better in a grocery store...

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