[ Oh god. Oh god. Are those things giant snakes? Please don't let them be really big snakes. You'd think a guy wearing full body armor and holding an assault rifle would be more confident against some giant lizard monsters. And you would be completely wrong.
His inner soundtrack is definitely fuckthisshitimout.mp3 right now.
Anyone nearby will definitely hear him trying to talk himself into not shitting his pants as one of the chaos serpents starts to advance on him. ]
Okay it's... it's probably not a snake. It has legs. Snakes don't have legs. Ohgodfuckme-! [ He scrambles away from a swipe from the chaos serpents and then actually remembers he's got a goddamn gun in his hands. He carries it around so much without actually using it that he forgets it's actually a weapon.
Eat lead giant lizards! ]
Confusion
[ When was the last time Simmons saw an actual kid? Like an actual kid and not Tucker's weird alien kid? Simmons has his helmet off which is probably a mistake because he has very vivid memories of middle school aged kids being fucking vicious when they sense weakness or think you look weird. And having some metal plating and a cyborg eye is definitely criteria for looking different. He'll probably try to edge away from any approaching kiddos unless they corner him.
To any adults in the area Simmons will ask the question that really ought to be on everyone's minds right now: ]
Is... is this normal? Shouldn't they all be in school or something?
Wildcard
[ Have anything else you wanna do? Let's do that thing! ]
dick simmons | red vs blue
[ Oh god. Oh god. Are those things giant snakes? Please don't let them be really big snakes. You'd think a guy wearing full body armor and holding an assault rifle would be more confident against some giant lizard monsters. And you would be completely wrong.
His inner soundtrack is definitely fuckthisshitimout.mp3 right now.
Anyone nearby will definitely hear him trying to talk himself into not shitting his pants as one of the chaos serpents starts to advance on him. ]
Okay it's... it's probably not a snake. It has legs. Snakes don't have legs. Ohgodfuckme-! [ He scrambles away from a swipe from the chaos serpents and then actually remembers he's got a goddamn gun in his hands. He carries it around so much without actually using it that he forgets it's actually a weapon.
Eat lead giant lizards! ]
Confusion
[ When was the last time Simmons saw an actual kid? Like an actual kid and not Tucker's weird alien kid? Simmons has his helmet off which is probably a mistake because he has very vivid memories of middle school aged kids being fucking vicious when they sense weakness or think you look weird. And having some metal plating and a cyborg eye is definitely criteria for looking different. He'll probably try to edge away from any approaching kiddos unless they corner him.
To any adults in the area Simmons will ask the question that really ought to be on everyone's minds right now: ]
Is... is this normal? Shouldn't they all be in school or something?
Wildcard
[ Have anything else you wanna do? Let's do that thing! ]