test drive meme #28

[hadrielmods]

Welcome to Hadriel's test drive, and thank you again for your interest in the game! As always, our reserves page is here, and our applications page is here! Reserves open January 25th, and apps are open February 1st. Please remember that there is an app cap of 20 apps.

Two quick points here as well:

1. Any thread made in Hadriel's test drive will be accepted as the sole Action Log sample in the application.
2. All threads made in the test drive can be considered game canon, either through handwaving or through a shared mental experience while coming through the Door!

Test drives will be broken up into specific god mini-events, during which your characters can see how well they fare under the watchful eye of one of the gods. Choose wisely or just simply pick 'em all, and have fun!

F E A R

SCENARIO ONE: GOT ANY BREATH MINTS?
[The Door brings in all that is chaotic and evil in the world. This may include you, may include the person next to you... and may include the monster behind you.

It looks like this time the Door is going for a little variety. You get to enjoy a couple kinds of chaos serpents, from the video game Hexen.

Chaos serpents are bipedal reptilian creatures with three horns, in two different colors. They can bite, as with most monsters, but the real threat is their breath weapons. The green ones spit powerful fireballs, while the brown ones spit clouds of poisonous gas. If you're lucky, they'll fight each other instead of you - but who ever gets lucky here?]

L O V E

SCENARIO TWO: ONE MINUTE IN HEAVEN
[Remember that first rush of infatuation, when your heart beats fast and your cheeks get red and you feel like you could do anything - anything - to get your crush's attention? Maybe you don't. Maybe you're too level-headed for that. Well, not anymore.

Now, whenever you meet a new person, you feel one solid minute of the most intense crush you've ever had. Their hair! Those eyes! Those incredibly attractive arm muscles! That tinkling laugh! Maybe you're the type to get nervous, maybe you'll swallow seven packets of hot sauce to show how cool you are, maybe you'll just lay down your very best pickup lines. Maybe more than one of the above - there are so many ways to embarrass yourself in 60 seconds!

But then time's up, and your insta-crush is gone, and now you get to deal with the consequences. What did you say? What did you do? That laugh you thought was beautiful and tinkling turns out to be obnoxious and honking. Also, you're pretty sure you just hit on your neighbor. But hey... maybe they actually are pretty hot, and you just made the first move. It's possible!]

C O N F U S I O N

SCENARIO THREE: THE PITTER PATTER OF LITTLE FEET
[There you were, minding your own business, when you suddenly fell into a deep sleep. Not that you remember that - now all you remember is being a child, as your consciousness has taken the form of your younger self. Here's your opportunity to run around and get into all the trouble you could hope for!

Or maybe you didn't become a child - maybe someone else did. Did some random kid just run up to you, confused and a little scared, or possibly just obnoxious? It'd be nice of you to help them out. Unless you hate kids, and hey, who can blame you? They're loud and somehow their little hands always seem to be sticky. Still. Make sure they don't run straight into the monsters outside the city, all right?

This is a mini version of our Hope of a Child event this month.]

Comments

michael j caboose | red vs blue

[ctrlfu]

Fear

[ Well this is just not right at all. How does one person get so turned around trying to find the bathroom?

And yet here he is. A massive soldier in blue armor, almost seven feet tall with a gun in hand, turning to observe the two scaly monsters that have taken note of each other first.

He watches as they toss their horned heads, opening their tooth-filled maws to assault one another with their unique breath weapons. Claws sing through the air, jaws gnashing as drifting clouds of poison curl upwards into the dark. The soldier standing there to the side observing them has only one response to the clash of the colossal reptilians, as a fireball sails past his head and crashes into a nearby wall. ]

Neat.

[ Luckily, standing still to watch seems to have ensured their attention stays on one another. For now. That's not likely to remain the case, but Caboose is entranced and unlikely to leave on his own. ]



Confusion

[ One could argue that this is a somewhat natural outcome. That the body now fits the mind. In either case, the stocky space marine simulation trooper is now considerably smaller than usual. He looks as though he could be about nine or ten, though large for his age. Dark, untidy hair tufts in all directions, and for the moment he has determined that playing 'pelican landing' is the coolest game that there is.

Which means arms out, and careening at top speed in random directions. And as everyone knows, 'landing' a pelican simply means that you stop it flying. Usually with the ground. But people work too.

Don't worry. He'll be making all the appropriate alarm noises before crashing headfirst into you. ]

Fear!

[igniting]

[Aloy, meanwhile, is crouched just out of sight, watching the monsters fight. She's sneaking her way through this, ready to help if needed but not willing to draw undue attention to herself.

But then, this guy looks like he's about to get roasted. She can never catch a break.]

Hey! Get over here!

[ctrlfu]

Okay!

[ With absolutely no effort towards stealth or quiet, Caboose starts meandering her way. That shout gets one creature's attention, only to let the other land a vicious blow to its jaw. The resounding noise of fury is enough to send chills to the core of any sane individual.

In other news, Caboose has finally arrived at where Aloy is crouched, peering down at her. ]

...hello!

[igniting]

[Aloy reaches for his arm, trying to pull him down beside her. Is this dude for real?]

Shh! They'll hear us. Get down!

[ctrlfu]

[ He absolutely is. But he does come down to crouch down beside her the second she tugs. At least he listens? ]

Oh! Well, I don't really know that being down here is gonna make them not hear us. That seems a little silly.

[ The fact that he hasn't adjusted his voice volume at all might have something to do with that, of course. ]

[igniting]

[Aloy lets out a long suffering sigh, then winces when one of their lizard friends roars.]

If you were whispering, that would help.

[ctrlfu]

Okay!

[ Then, he seems to realize what she's getting at, and in the loudest stage-whisper he can manage-- ]

Okay!

[igniting]

[She closes her eyes. Okay. Okay. She can get them both out of this.]

Quieter. Can you stay low and follow me to the exit? Without attracting attention?

[requiemshark]

[There is a small child coming at him. Ephemera stares. Then stares some more. He's in full armor, helmet concealing his face. The child shows no sign of slowing down or dodging.

He holds out his arm to prevent the disaster of Small Human Being coming into contact with his very solid set of armor.]

No.

[ctrlfu]

[ It does little to deter the littlest pelican, save that instead of the armor? His head smacks straight into the man's gloved hand, and he proceeds to continue to push forward with...unusual strength for a tyke.

All the while continuing to bleep and blare, arms dipping and rocking from side to side like the anguished throes of a crashing pelican might. ]

Oh no! We have fallen into a tractor beam! They...they are gonna make tractors out of all of us!

[ And if you can imagine a ten year old gasping and shouting in alarm in an impression of a crew's worth of personnel, in quick secession -- including a fairly heartwrenching 'but i gotta get home to my kid!' -- that is precisely what happens, as he continues to try and push forward against the man's hand. ]

[requiemshark]

[What the fuck.

Ephemera stares down at the kid. Surprisingly strong for something so little.

Then he sighs, drops his hand, and side-steps at the same time. Leaving the kid pushing against nothing. Gravity should take care of the rest in a moment.]

Right. Okay then.

[ctrlfu]

[ Sure enough, wham!

Caboose goes tipping forward, the sheer momentum causing him to flip forward, clonk himself sharply on the head, and go tumbling forward. For a moment he just lies there, sprawled, blinking.

Then, belatedly, out of the child comes a noise mimicking an explosion. ]

[requiemshark]

[Yeah, that was a hard landing. Ephemera winces a little.]

You okay?

[ctrlfu]

Yeah, it's okay. I landed on my head, and it's kinda used to it, so...

[ He rocks into an upright position, shaking his head briefly, obviously a little dazed but seeming no worse for wear. ]

That was an awesome landing! I gotta try it again.

[requiemshark]

[.....right.]

You probably shouldn't land on your head. Especially here.

[Something might take the opportunity to eat him.]

confusion

[hardwearing]

[ Wash has next to no experience with children, and now they're everywhere. He stands outside his apartment spire in full armor (he had been planning on going for a run) staring in confusion at the kids milling about. Some playing, others distraught and crying, all different ages and sizes and none of them recognizable as the handful of kids that were already in the city prior to today. Not that he interacts with many of them, either.

He's pulled off his helmet and is kneeling down to address a crying little girl when he hears something... strange behind him. Alarm noises? He glances over his shoulder just in time to see another kid running straight at him, arms stretched out like he's flying. ]

H-hey! Stop!

[ctrlfu]

[ Too late to turn on the breaks now. ]

AHHHHHHHHHHHHHHH!

[ No doubt emulating the cries of the doomed passengers of the pelican, Caboose collides firmly with the suit of armor. Rather than appear hurt, however, he simply bounces back and lands on the ground in a sprawl, rolling back and forth with accompanying noises of agony. ]

Uuuuuugh, oh no, the paaaaain....tell my wife I loved herrrrrr....

[hardwearing]

[ At Caboose's dramatics the other kid flees, leaving Wash to straighten up with helmet in hand and confusion plain on his face. He'd never been the most imaginative child, himself, definitely not at this age. Isn't this kid a little old to keep up the act after plowing into strangers?

What's he expected to do anyway? Just play along? How does he child? Certainly he can't just walk away while the kid's moaning there on the ground. ]

...well at least you didn't give yourself a concussion. Come on, get up.

[ Apparently he's opted to be a stick in the mud. ]

[ctrlfu]

It's too late...for us...oh no the fuel tanks noooooo--

[ At which point his arms seize upwards, and he makes the most dramatic explosion noise he can manage, before his arms drop to his sides, head flopping, tongue lolling out briefly.

For all of five seconds. Then he's popping up to sit upright, peering up at Wash. ]

Hello!

[hardwearing]

....hi.

[ Things could be much worse, Wash tells himself. Though if the kid had smashed his head and started bawling, at least the course of action would be clear. Scoop him up and get him to the clinic. This has him floundering a bit. ]

You uh. Really shouldn't do that, you know. Running into people. Especially not around here.

[ctrlfu]

[ You invited this on yourself, Wash.

Caboose tilts his head slightly. ]

...why?

[hardwearing]

[ What do you mean why--??? Who raised this child? ]

Because it makes people angry? Sometimes really angry. Do you understand that?

[ He's personally more bewildered than anything, but there are some very dangerous people in this city, kiddo. ]

Fear

[lovernotafighter]

[Shit shit shit shit shit. The fear in his gut wasn't about being in a near-death situation; Tucker was almost used to that amid seemingly daily wars and time loops and Freelancer bullshit and pregnancy. Hell, even as scary as these weird serpent creepers were, if he squinted, Tucker could almost imagine them as distant relatives to his son; they did sort of have that whole alien vibe kicking. More violent, but not by that much, really?

Sure, it all still weirded him the fuck out, but that wasn't what was really scaring him.]

Goddammit, Caboose!

[Corralling this particular wayward Blue Team member while trying not to let him go make friends with those same serpents? Now that was scary.

Okay, so at least Tucker didn't yell it, managed to bite it back with a hiss. He knew better than to call him over, was well-versed in what a disaster it would be over the years. Besides, it wasn't like Tucker was sporting his own patience on the whole damn thing.

So he darted out and rushed over to him, trying to put himself between Caboose and the monsters as nonchalantly as possible as he hoped to lure him away with...something. He didn't know yet. Ninety-percent of dealing with Caboose was winging it.] Dude, come on, we gotta go, but we're playing the quiet game on the way, okay? Winner gets to keeps Wash's helmet as a fruit basket.

[Sure. Right. We'll go with that.]

[ctrlfu]

Oh man, yeah, um, I am the BEST at the quiet game, so. Y'know, you should probably just prepare to lose right now. That fruit basket is gonna look so great on the dining room table.

[ The ground rumbles as one of the things throws its fellow against a nearby wall, and Caboose tilts his head slightly to one side. ]

Wait. We should probably get a dining room table.

[lovernotafighter]

[Okay, yeah, he was used to this, these tangents and trains of thoughts; one didn't live with someone for, like, a million years and not get used to this level of insanity. And really, Caboose was begrudgingly family at this point, whether either one of them liked it or not.]

Yeah, probably, but we gotta stay alive and not let those - what the fuck are they - eat us, okay?

[He winced at the crash behind, hands finding Caboose's armor and shoving him. Shit, Wash would kill him for this, but whatever; he'd tell him it was Caboose's idea. It was fine. Everything was fine.]