dankmemes | Test Drive Meme #22

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!test drive

Test Drive Meme #22

Welcome to Hadriel's test drive, and thank you again for your interest in the game! As always, our reserves page is here, and our applications page is here! Reserves open July 25th, and apps are open August 1st. Please remember that there is an app cap of 20 apps.

Two quick points here as well:
1. Any thread made in Hadriel's test drive will be accepted as the sole Action Log sample in the application.
2. All threads made in the test drive can be considered game canon, either through handwaving or through a shared mental experience while coming through the Door!

Test drives will be broken up into specific god mini-events, during which your characters can see how well they fare under the watchful eye of one of the gods. Choose wisely or just simply pick 'em all, and have fun!

F E A R

SCENARIO ONE: THE WRONG KIND OF SCARY
[The Door brings in all that is chaotic and evil in the world. This may include you, may include the person next to you... and may include the monster behind you.

There's an odd shuffling to your right and to your left. Do you know what that is? Maybe not, but at least nobody else does either. You might peek at an eye stalk or a stinger, you might catch a glimpse of something that can maybe pass for fingers... or maybe it just has a mouth on its butt because its creator was feeling particularly sadistic that day. That's right, you're looking at the creatures from Spore, EA's infamous alien creation game with the most awkward alien creator imaginable.

These particular Spore creatures are the carnivorous kind, the kind who seek out and eat other creatures so that they can instantly procreate to pass on their victim's genetic code and make their species even more wild. You might not want to stick around and watch the mating process. I promise it's just as weird as you think.]

T R A N Q U I L I T Y / C O N F U S I O N

SCENARIO TWO: STEPFORD SUNDAY
[You wake up one lovely weekend morning to the sounds of birds chirping outside and sun streaming through your window. What a wonderful day to be perfectly normal and happy in the suburbs! Your family is all around you, like a Norman Rockwell painting, happy to go about their average day in their average life in their average city.

So what if your sister is an archdemon? Or your father is somehow a dragon? It's just the way that things have always been... isn't it?

The perceptive of you may begin to see cracks in the veneer, may begin to wonder why everything seems to be so perfect... and as the truth begins to unfold, it paints a much darker picture than the one you're seeing. Are you sure you don't want to stay, just a little while longer?

This is a mini version of our Stepford Summer event this month!]

R A G E / D E L I G H T

SCENARIO THREE: CAKE WARS
[There are plenty of ways in this world to rouse your competitive spirit. Many of them involve athletics- few involve such beautiful edible artistry as this.

That's right, you're in a cake baking competition, and no matter how competitive you normally are, thanks to Rage's influence, you want to win. Competitors can be in teams of two or alone, and they have until morning to bake their cakes to the fullest and bring it to Delight's temple for judging.

So what kind of cake baker are you? Do you revel in your artistry? Do you measure everything and carefully prepare each icing tip? Or do you know that you suck at cooking and decide to use the opportunity to sabotage your opponent's cake instead? Nothing is off limits, and all's fair in cake and war, after all!]

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[See, here's the thing. If someone had told Taako "you're gonna find this amazing guy and actually want him to care about you" a few years ago, he'd have probably laughed straight in their face. Truthfully, knowing Taako's typical disposition, it wouldn't be much of a "probably" and more of an "absolutely", because he's not the type that deals in that sort of saccharine bullshit south of a cake order. Emotions are for people who can handle them, and also idiots, because idiots don't know what they're getting themselves into.

Then, of course, there was Kravitz. And Taako has joked in the past about being an idiot, but now he's convinced himself entirely that he's indeed a triple-decker moron bus for how hard he fell for this goddamn man. But he's a little past the point of denial now, if the ring on his finger is any indication.

He's more prone to sleeping in when Kravitz leaves early, seeing as late nights at the restaurant are much more commonplace when they don't even always run a lunch service. But that leaves him time to make his own personal lunch dropoff for a certain someone.

He swings into Kravitz' office as soon as he's sure there's not anyone like, sobbing in the next room. This wouldn't be the first time he accidentally busted a door down to do something romantic and was met with a widower. But Kravitz has asked him to mitigate that, at least a little. As it stands, he's got a few hours to burn, and he leans against the office doorway in one of his favorite flirty sundresses, hair pulled back but otherwise loose.]

Hey. You're doing that thing again. That thing when you're here and not paying attention to me.

[At this stage, Kravitz knows far better than to even attempt to continue working. Taako is here, so it's Taako time now. Not that he has any qualms with that- far from it, if the way he immediately sets aside his work and pushes his chair back is any indication. There is a perfect amount of space on his lap for someone Taako-sized, now. What a coincidence.

He looks his husband over (in a manner so far removed from subtle that the admiration in his eyes could probably be viewed from space) and wonders if that swooping sensation in his stomach is ever going to stop being a thing when Taako enters a room.

Probably not. This is also fine.]

Please. Presently, you have every ounce of my attention. And you always have at least a fraction of it. It's something of a problem.

[Damn right it's Taako Time now. Kravitz makes room for him and it swells something in Taako's heart that he never has to take the space he wants when Kravitz is around; he gives it, willingly, to make space for him in his life. Those little gestures that mean you're wanted that he'll never be able to articulate how much it means to him. Because you know, even when he's married don't make him explain emotional intimacy that sounds fake.

He sways across the room, setting down a brown paper bag with handles onto Kravitz's desk as he settles into his lap, locking one arm around his neck for, uh, balance or whatever stupid reason he could justify but won't. Again, Kravitz doesn't push. He welcomes.]

Oh yeah what a shame. Lookin' at dead people all day and trying to concentrate, but your mind is just always, oh man, you know what would improve this? Taako. And, you know, you're not wrong probably like every time. Guess the universe'll just have to deal with it, my guy.

[He leans forward, placing a kiss on Kravitz' forehead because he can't keep his hands off and this seems like a good outlet for that right now.]

Brought you somethin'.

[Kravitz loops one arm around his waist in return, because look, you can never be too safe, when it comes to balance and all. Taako understands, he's sure. His free hand comes up to cover his mouth and stifle ugly laughter, because as usual, Taako is saying something he knows he shouldn't be laughing at but really, really wants to.]

I do not look at dead people all day.

[The kiss melts him down, makes him sink further into the chair and want to brush his fingers against Taako's cheek- so he does.

The window of opportunity Taako has given him here is too good, and Kravitz holds his gaze suggestively, one eyebrow raised.]

I see that. [A pause. Comedic timing is everything.] Ah, you mean in the bag. Of course.

[He smacks at Kravitz' chest, albeit lightly, and purses his lips in a fake pout. His hand is still splayed across his front as he lets his own moment of comedy pass before he breaks it.]

No, I mean me. I'm always a gift, Krav, don't forget it. Today I just come with a cherry on top.

[He reaches behind him, one arm staying around Kravitz' neck to retrieve a box from inside the bag he's placed, setting it on the desk and popping the tab open quickly with deft fingers. Yes, he made a bento box. Yes, it's the gayest thing I could possibly think of. There's hot dogs cut into little octopuses and everything.]

Look at this. Fuckin' artistry, my dude.

[As Taako smacks his chest, Kravitz catches his fingers, just briefly, only long enough to give them a squeeze. He's pursed his lips, and all Kravitz can think is, thank goodness I'm allowed to have this with you.]

I wouldn't dream of taking you for granted for a second. Or your food, for that matter.

[It's all terribly saccharine, but he can't find it in himself to mind even a little. He knows, with certainty hard earned, that Taako appreciates it. Feels the same, even.

But go ǵ̶̶̛́ơ̢͝ ̵̡̕͘͞d͘ ͏̶̨̡ ̶͜s̢͘͜͠ ҉̵̢,̶̵̕,̸̢ ̶̧͟͜s̢̧̛͞h̶̕ę̶͘͜ ̨́͢҉í̧̕s͠҉ ̢̨̢̛n̨̧'̛́͡t̨͘҉͏ ̶̶̡͜͞l͞͏͢a̸͘͡y͘ ̨́͞҉̡t̸̛h̶̸̸͘ę͡͠ ̵̢̀̕͠f̛é̴a̸̕t̴h̡̛͡ ̶̴̧̀҉e͢͢r̴̡͢͝s̴̴ ̛̀́,̡̀͟͏ ̀͘à͝ ̷͜͢c̷̢̛͢͡i̸̡̕͘r͜͏c҉̴̛͜ļ́͘͡e̛͢ d, even having just thought that, Kravitz's heart still ties itself in knots of surprise and delight when he sees the effort Taako has put in. He presses in close, smiling as he kisses the corner of Taako's mouth.

He doesn't move away to speak, instead resting his forehead against the other's.]

Thank you.

...Octopus hotdogs, hm?

Edited 2017-08-11 12:43 (UTC)

Uh, yeah. You cut 'em before you cook em and then the little tentacles curl up.

[He even drew a little ketchup face on it. Look, it's smiling. Appreciate this effort so Taako doesn't have to say it, goodness.

He shifts just enough so he can pick one up, careful not to smudge the face, and brings it up to Kravitz' lips, their faces probably still too close to eat properly, but no harm no foul. Like, yeah, he made lunch, but the real point was getting up close and personal before he had to attend to his own responsibilities.]

C'mon, open up babe. I know it's totally awful to have to destroy such art, but you got me here to stare at, so it all works out.

[The embarrassing truth is that he never stops appreciating everything about Taako.]

You're right, as always.

[Kravitz takes a bite, carefully so as to not end up with sauce all over his suit. The close proximity definitely makes it a little difficult, and he's sure it's still ended up on his face. Taako may have offered it with the intent of flirting, but Kravitz's breaks into a wide smile the second the taste hits him.]

This is astoundingly good.

[Oh my god Krav that's gay. He watches, carefully, as he eats, and his face splits into a grin when he speaks, leaning forward and kissing a bit of sauce from the corner of his mouth.]

Uh, yeah? Babe, I'm Taako. This is high tier gourmet stuff, natch. You really think I would make something that isn't the tastiest thing ever? Who do you think you're talkin' to?

[He pops the rest of the hot dog piece into his mouth and goes to retrieve a rice ball. It seems he does actually intend on feeding this to him bite-by-bite if he doesn't protest.]

[~~uhhhh surprise he's gay???~~ He flushes, and gives Taako a look, despite the fact that he should be very used to this kind of behaviour by now. (He is, really, but that doesn't make his stomach dip any less.)]

Wait, you're Taako? Taako from TV?

[Kravitz covers up his fluster with feigned shock, mouth just south of a grin. As for Taako's plans- well, he certainly isn't going to say no.]

[IT'S NOT A SURPRISE, BABE, JUST SAYIN'. But then Kravitz does something so impossibly cute he almost can't stand it, and he laughs, musical and light, leaning back and away into a fake swoon, using his hand on Kravitz' neck to steady himself as he bobs back and then forward again.]

Oh, the very same!

[He brings himself in closer after that, shifting in Kravitz' lap to straddle his hips, one hand still on the back of his neck as the other sits with a subtle pressure against his chest.]

Thanks for being a fan, darling.

[Okay, so like, he made all that food, but also he already got the thing he wanted (compliments) so now he's getting the second thing he wants, which is pressing his lips against Kravitz', slow and deep.]

[The way he laughs, the way he plays along, the way his lashes brush over his cheeks as he fake swoons- all of it is enchanting. Taako is enchanting. And close, and warm (always so warm, compared to Kravitz, and he doesn't know how, but it doesn't matter) and kissing him.

He doesn't pull back until he feels he needs to, breath catching, and smiles that secret sort of smile at Taako, the one that speaks to years of familiarity and understanding.]

Your number one, I think, if I could be so presumptuous. I'm sure you must hear that all the time.

[Kravitz pushes a lock of long, light hair out of Taako's face and tucks it behind his ear. It's a good excuse to lean back in and press another kiss to the now exposed line of his jaw.]

[Honestly, Taako would probably rather suffocate than stop kissing his husband at this point, but Kravitz breaks it for their own good. Still, he doesn't move very far at all, foreheads pressed together until Kravitz continues to lavish him with attention.]

Oh, everyone wants to be my biggest fan, dear. But mmmm, I'd say you've put in your bid to be the president of that fanclub.

[He leans into Kravitz' touch, smiling in a way that very few ever see. It's warm, and genuine, and simply happy, without reservation, without holding back. Pressed this close, Kravitz can probably feel Taako's heartbeat, the way it flutters when his lips touch his skin, the little flutter in his breath when it does.]

Even an exclusive meet-and-greet. This is a deluxe experience, my dude.

[He places another kiss to Kravitz' cheek now, nuzzling his nose into soft skin, hand snaking up his chest to tangle in his hair.]

[Kravitz laughs and sighs, content and longing all at once. Taako's fingers curl through his hair, and Kravitz presses another kiss to his lips, more demanding than usual. His own hand climbs up to rest over Taako's chest, fingers spread across his rapid beating heart.]

Must we really go back to work?

[And then he does a double take at himself, leaning down and chuckling into Taako's neck.]

Look at this. Look at what you've done to me.

[He can't help but grin wider, proud but not yet satisfied, as Kravitz speaks and he knows he's so close to winning the gold of this whole thing. He tilts his head up a bit, so his mouth is more level with Kravitz' ear, and grinds his hips down, the motion causing the hem of his dress to ride up an inch more, a breathy moan gracing Kravitz' ear before he speaks.]

Oh, I think if you're still worrying about that I haven't done enough.

[Last chance to get this menace to stop, Krav, if you really want him to.]

[His chuckle falters out into a stutter, and he finds his eyes glued to the motion of Taako's dress crawling up his legs.

Kravitz is positive that he opened his mouth to fondly admonish and put an end to this. What comes out instead is something else altogether.]

Did you, er, lock the door when you came in?

[I'm going to get fired, he thinks, before remembering, Ah. I'm the boss.]

Edited 2017-10-31 10:40 (UTC)

[Taako leans back, not moving his hips but shifting enough that he can see Kravitz' face, and brings his right hand hand up to cup his chin, long fingers resting over the side of his face and over to his ear.]

Oh babe, of course.

[He doesn't remember in the least if he did or not. But he also 100% does not care. He moves his wrist to tilt Kravitz' face, and Kravitz can probably feel the cold band of his ring on his jawline.]

Now c'mon. I brought you my gift. Pay up, handsy boy.

[And he guides Kravitz' mouth to his, intent on enjoying what's finally, blissfully his.]

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Test Drive Meme #22

KICKS THE FUCKING DOOR DOWN, GIMME THE STEPFORD GAYS

HERE THEY ARE!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!

YEEEEEEEAH!!!!!!

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tags back 500 yrs late for the fadeout lol

UR FINE