dankmemes | Test Drive Meme #22

Welcome to Hadriel's test drive, and thank you again for your interest in the game! As always, our reserves page is here, and our applications page is here! Reserves open July 25th, and apps are open August 1st. Please remember that there is an app cap of 20 apps.

Two quick points here as well:
1. Any thread made in Hadriel's test drive will be accepted as the sole Action Log sample in the application.
2. All threads made in the test drive can be considered game canon, either through handwaving or through a shared mental experience while coming through the Door!

Test drives will be broken up into specific god mini-events, during which your characters can see how well they fare under the watchful eye of one of the gods. Choose wisely or just simply pick 'em all, and have fun!

F E A R

SCENARIO ONE: THE WRONG KIND OF SCARY
[The Door brings in all that is chaotic and evil in the world. This may include you, may include the person next to you... and may include the monster behind you.

There's an odd shuffling to your right and to your left. Do you know what that is? Maybe not, but at least nobody else does either. You might peek at an eye stalk or a stinger, you might catch a glimpse of something that can maybe pass for fingers... or maybe it just has a mouth on its butt because its creator was feeling particularly sadistic that day. That's right, you're looking at the creatures from Spore, EA's infamous alien creation game with the most awkward alien creator imaginable.

These particular Spore creatures are the carnivorous kind, the kind who seek out and eat other creatures so that they can instantly procreate to pass on their victim's genetic code and make their species even more wild. You might not want to stick around and watch the mating process. I promise it's just as weird as you think.]

T R A N Q U I L I T Y / C O N F U S I O N

SCENARIO TWO: STEPFORD SUNDAY
[You wake up one lovely weekend morning to the sounds of birds chirping outside and sun streaming through your window. What a wonderful day to be perfectly normal and happy in the suburbs! Your family is all around you, like a Norman Rockwell painting, happy to go about their average day in their average life in their average city.

So what if your sister is an archdemon? Or your father is somehow a dragon? It's just the way that things have always been... isn't it?

The perceptive of you may begin to see cracks in the veneer, may begin to wonder why everything seems to be so perfect... and as the truth begins to unfold, it paints a much darker picture than the one you're seeing. Are you sure you don't want to stay, just a little while longer?

This is a mini version of our Stepford Summer event this month!]

R A G E / D E L I G H T

SCENARIO THREE: CAKE WARS
[There are plenty of ways in this world to rouse your competitive spirit. Many of them involve athletics- few involve such beautiful edible artistry as this.

That's right, you're in a cake baking competition, and no matter how competitive you normally are, thanks to Rage's influence, you want to win. Competitors can be in teams of two or alone, and they have until morning to bake their cakes to the fullest and bring it to Delight's temple for judging.

So what kind of cake baker are you? Do you revel in your artistry? Do you measure everything and carefully prepare each icing tip? Or do you know that you suck at cooking and decide to use the opportunity to sabotage your opponent's cake instead? Nothing is off limits, and all's fair in cake and war, after all!]

Flat | Top-Level Comments Only

[The power coming off of Law makes the hair on the back of Yurick's neck prickle up. What on Earth is that??? He should probably run, shouldn't he? He doesn't really have any shield magic. At best he can reverse magic into healing magic if they're offensive magic (and vice versa). But that... doesn't seem to be particularly what this is, does it?

And it's hard not to note the rather creepy looking monster not too far off from himself. Yea, that.... Well, at least it's not a ghost? It doesn't do much to make him feel better, though. This world is seriously messed up.

But then he feels the slice of something. But it's... not painful? And he's on the ground before he knows it.

Colour him surprised (and extremely disturbed) when he finds himself separated from his legs. He lets out a yell followed by:]

Oh, come on!

[He's been here a solid three minutes and he's already been decapitated? Save him before he loses his mind. He doesn't need this mindfuckery right now.]

[Law hears the shout from just to his left as he's cleaning up the mess, hitting a couple of struggling offenders with point blank "shots" from the tip of his blade, and finally turns to see that he did catch someone by accident. Oops.

He strides over swiftly and grabs Yurick's lower half, dragging it over to him.]

Quickly. Just stick yourself together, you'll go back to normal as soon as everything is touching. I missed a few of them, we'd better move. [and then, almost an afterthought] Sorry.

I... Excuse me, what?!?!

[Yurick just sounds absolutely like he got dealt a hand of bullshit on top of extra bullshit.]

Can you not see that you've decapitated me, I'm blee-- [Oh. Actually, as he looks down at himself, there's no blood.

...Not any less perturbing, but... Still, why does he have to pull himself back together? This is all Law's fault, isn't it? Inconvenient at best, rude at worst. And a sorry is all he gets for it. Definitely more on the rude side of things.

He'll do as he's told, but this is beginning to feel like some really screwed up dream world. How does this even happen?

He sighs when he's finally able to stand up.]

Look, you move, and how about I take care of this. [His tone seems only slightly annoyed at this point. Somehow. At least he won't decapitate any passerby like Law does.]

[It really is Law's fault, but his attention is almost wholly on the Spores, not his unfortunate collateral damage. It helps that he knows the extent of his ability and will or won't work. Sticking yourself back together? Totally works. That confidence allows him to focus on battling the real enemies.]

Oh? Can you even do that?

[that extra bit of asshole is free of charge. Law doesn't lower the Room, but he edges to the side, lowering his sword as if to invite Yurick to go ahead and give it his best shot.]

As a matter of fact, I can.

[He's not impressed with your shit, Law.

He dusts himself off briefly as Law steps aside. And briefly, as Yurick focuses his magic, he levitates. It takes a small span of time for his magic to properly precipitate, but when it does, Yurick can't help but laugh maniacally as he casts Meteor on the poor, unsuspecting beasts. It rains down fireballs onto the monsters. Thankfully, it won't injure allies. Or... Law, in this case.

Just to show him how it's done.

When the spell ends, Yurick prepares himself to land another one if the need should rise. The problem with being as prominent in magic as he is would be that he's not all that spectacular at physical combat. He is a rather squishy wizard.]

[Flashy, and effective. But Law only raises an eyebrow to show his actual level of impression. The Fleet Admiral can do that in his sleep, but the floating bit is...different. At least, that takes care of the problem, both the incapacitated bits of Spores and the ones still coming.

Satisfied, Law allows the Room to vanish, turning and sheathing his long sword.]

Hanging out here to see if more are coming doesn't seem like a smart idea. The problem is, where to go?

[this is very much not his cabin in his submarine where he was a few minutes ago. In fact, there's no sign of ocean at all, and that doesn't bode well.]

[Law has a point. Waiting for more was only an effective tactic when you had more people on your side and a mission to accomplish. Two men against a large group would be a poor idea.

And that's a good question, since he has no idea where they are. He had also hoped very much to find the rest of his team of other mercenaries. He doesn't like the fact that he woke up alone in a strange place. Had something happened to the others?]

Well, all things considered, we should probably start with anywhere but here. If we don't know the scenery, we can't find our way around. Unless you've got a map, we'll have to pick a direction.

[His tone is a mix between bossy and matter-of-fact. Besides, what have they got to lose?]

Do you want to lead the way, or shall I, then?

I have no idea where this is, so. [turns on his heel and takes point without a word: decision made. This way.]

You don't know it either. That makes neither of us locals.

[his eyes shift right and left as he goes, hunting for a first glimpse of anything familiar, anything likewise humanoid, and hoping not to spot any more of those monsters instead. He's certain of his own skills and his unlikely companion's not too shabby with his own, so they probably won't get killed so long as they aren't surprised.]

You think? [Have some sarcasm, Law. Still, he follows without too much more complaint.]

Where are you from, anyway? You're attire is... interesting, I suppose we'll call it.

[He's not particularly interested, per se. But perhaps he can calculate to some end their location through mental mapping of locations and points between.]

I suggest we find an inn. They should be able to give us some more information.

[And maybe Zael and the others are already waiting there, or even booked rooms for the night.]

[are you dissing his fuzzy hat, man?]

...that's the pot calling the kettle black. [because he can't not be an ass, even at a time like this.] From my ship if you want to be technical about it. From North Blue if you want to bother going all the way back to my childhood.

[at least there are buildings of a sort, but nothing like anywhere Law has been recently]

Yeah. Or a bar. People with information tend to gather in taverns.

I'll have you know my attire is fairly standard. I certainly don't draw attention by my clothing alone.

[He's totally dissing your fuzzy hat. And everything else about you.]

North Blue? [He mentally checks for anything resembling such a name on his maps.

...Not even a little.]

Where is that? I've never heard of it. [Maybe it's a previously undiscovered island and that's why Law's clothes look so weird.]

[Oh, geez, a bar. Is this guy going to be like another Syrenne? ...Hopefully without the promiscuity... Sigh.]

I suppose so; though, if it's a bar, I'll leave the socializing to you. I prefer... smaller groups.

[Of people who aren't loud and obnoxious, thank you very much.]

Yeah, uh huh. [he feels the judging. Fortunately, he doesn't care that much. He's got his hat, he's got his sword, nothing else can bother him. Except, perhaps being attacked from behind.]

North. [what, were you expecting a helpful answer?] If you've never heard of it, then either you're from some backwater island that never gets news or... [with another wary glance around] This isn't my world.

[Don't worry Yurick, if they happen to find a bar, it's not for the socializing. Law just brushes that suggestion off and digs into one pocket of his jeans, pulling out a tiny snail which happens to be wearing a tiny version of his floofy hat. It's fast asleep, and no amount of poking at it rouses it.]

...hm. That second option is looking more and more likely.

Test Drive Meme #22

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