dankmemes | Test Drive Meme #24

Welcome to Hadriel's test drive, and thank you again for your interest in the game! As always, our reserves page is here, and our applications page is here! Reserves open September 24th, and apps are open October 1st. Please remember that there is an app cap of 20 apps.

Two quick points here as well:
1. Any thread made in Hadriel's test drive will be accepted as the sole Action Log sample in the application.
2. All threads made in the test drive can be considered game canon, either through handwaving or through a shared mental experience while coming through the Door!

Test drives will be broken up into specific god mini-events, during which your characters can see how well they fare under the watchful eye of one of the gods. Choose wisely or just simply pick 'em all, and have fun!

F E A R

SCENARIO ONE: TITAN TERRORS
[The Door brings in all that is chaotic and evil in the world. This may include you, may include the person next to you... and may include the monster behind you.

In this case, the monster behind you may as well be the monster above you. No, not anything flying overhead, but the freakishly giant nude monsters hellbent on shoving your crunchy body into their mouths and chowing down.

Titans are large humanlike creatures who have superior strength, though more limited intelligence. Much like zombies, they desire only to devour all of the humans in their vicinity and will use any tools at their disposal to do so. Get your steel guitars ready and get pumped, because sie sind das essen und wir sind die jager!!!]

R A G E

SCENARIO TWO: PAINTBALL ROYALE
[You've got a gun.

Okay, it's not a real gun- it's actually a paintball gun, which seems to knock people unconscious when you hit them. That's a pretty sweet deal! Except, you really want to be the last one standing, and you'll knock out countless people to do it. Every fight feels like life or death, whether you're waiting in the shadows to get the drop on someone or spraying paint all across the open streets in the fain hopes that you might get a tag or two.

Either way, if you lose, you'll find yourself waking up in a party! That's not so bad, right? It's a giant gathering of all the paint-covered losers in the city, with free food and drinks and a distribution of excellent prizes. What did you win? Fight your friends, but not in the dark and trauma-y way, and be the next winner of our Hadriel death (not really) match!

This is a mini version of our Party Royale event this month.]

C O N F U S I O N

SCENARIO THREE: WALK WALK FASHION BABY
[Your trusty leather jacket is gone. So are your worn and torn jeans, all your summer dresses, your boots and high tops and heels. Suddenly, nothing is where you expect it to be, not even that load of clothes that you've left in the laundry for the past few weeks (oops). In the stead of all of your beloved duds, you find some stuff that... might be a little questionable.

Whether you were the lucky recipient of the hand shawl, the face skirt, the suspender sweats or some other wild atrocity, you'll be sure to have some fun trying to maneuver around the city in your weird, cumbersome outfits. At least you don't look as silly as that guy over there in the sea urchin costume!]

Flat | Top-Level Comments Only

He certainly thinks so.

[In spite of himself, Germany's expression eases. He does truly care about his brother, even if these days, he seems to just make more trouble for him.]

His name is Gilbert. He should be here somewhere. Just look for someone with white hair and an incredibly loud mouth.

You said you are from Berlin, but your English is very good. Did you spend time in America, before... this?

[Whatever "this" is.]

[Oh. Newt wasn't expecting that answer.] Really? Cool that you have someone from home here with you. I don't think I've met him yet.

[He does a cursory glance over the crowd, but no one fitting that description immediately stands out. Oh well. Maybe they'll run into each other later.]

Thanks! Yeah, I went to MIT. Taught there for a few years, too. [He's not bragging you're bragging.] I'm stationed in Hong Kong, at the moment. Or, uh. I was, I guess. [It's now past tense for a few reasons...]

That is easy for you to say, but...

[He lets himself press his fingertips to his forehead as if to ward off a building headache. Austria... is the source of the headache...

But it seems wrong to complain about other countries to his own citizen? He isn't sure what the proper protocol is for that, but surely there must be some. So instead, he'll take another sip from his beer and keep the focus on Newt himself.]

You taught at MIT? [At least he sounds suitably impressed??] So you're a professor of...?

[He'll ask about being "stationed" in a minute, he wants to know more about him teaching!

And whether or not he wore pajamas. To class.]

[Newt will happily accept avoiding subjects in exchange for talking about him! Well played, Germany.]

Biology. Mostly. They let me teach a couple courses on musical engineering, too. But that was, like, a decade ago.

[He says all this while munching on a cookie. Very professional.]

A decade ago?

[??? A child professor??]

You're quite young to be a professor. I'm impressed.

[In spite of... the cookie. And the Godzilla pjs. Yeah he needs to drink his beer maybe it'll make more sense after that.

Also Germany absolutely looks at least ten years younger than Newt so like. Even if he's talking like he's older than Newt is, he sure doesn't look it.]

I've always had an interest in mechanical engineering, but I haven't had as much time to focus on it in the modern era. Er... these days, I should say.

[Newt smirks. Yes please stroke his ego.] Second youngest student ever to get into MIT. They offered me a job as soon as I had a degree. Guess they wanted to secure bragging rights. [He shrugs like it ain't no thing, but clearly he's very proud of himself.]

Cool, dude. What kind of--wait, modern era? [He ticks up an eyebrow.] Come again?

It sounds like any German university would have been honored to have you, as well.

[There's a gentle rebuke in his voice, though it's not entirely aimed at Newt himself. Stupid America, stealing all his best scientists... this just means once he finds his way home, he has work to do! To make sure his universities are better than America's!]

These days, [he says again, lips pressing together in an awkward line,] I've unfortunately been wrapped up in business with the EU. It leaves little time for other hobbies.

[He mirrors Newt's expression, raised eyebrow and all.]

I'm certain a professor of biology at MIT has little interest in the minutiae of import/export tariffs and the like between states.

True, but like, it's MIT, dude. [What rebuke, where???]

Oh. [Modern era, though. What? But he won't press for now. Maybe this guy's just struggling a little with English?] I've been there. Being too busy for hobbies, I mean. I've been swamped with K-Science stuff for months, then the war ends and I get yanked off to this crummy town. [Terrible luck. He was going to start a band!!!]

I'm not a professor anymore. I joined up with PPDC back in 2016. [...Oh, right.] You don't have Kaiju where you're from, do you?

[this shit again smh.]

[Maybe if he worked hard, he could have a university better than MIT!!!!

War though...?]

Kaiju...? Is that a Japanese word?

[??? That's all he's got, though. He likes ninja movies but monster movies are a little beyond him.]

I'm not familiar with the PPDC.

Yeah. It just means monster. It's, like, have you seen Godzilla? [He shifts a bit to wag his Godzilla tail at Germany. He has six doctorates.] Like that. So when big nasty aliens started coming up from this interdimensional portal at the bottom of the ocean, we started calling them Kaiju because it was a lot like one of the old Godzilla movies. But, like, for real.

[He takes a bite of a cookie he's been holding and continues on, his mouth full.] PPDC is Pan-Pacific Defense Corps. World-wide military designed for the sake of fighting the Kaiju. Most people know of it because of the Jaeger program, but we do other stuff, too. I'm one of the last two K-Science officers. Hence Hong Kong.

[His tone suggests that this is all very impressive and you should be proud of him even if you don't know what any of it means!!!]

[This man.... was a professor at MIT..........]

I know what Godzilla is.

[Please don't wag your pajama tail at him again.]

Edited 2017-09-25 00:18 (UTC)

[In spite of Newt's... behavioral quirks, Germany does listen politely. Even if his brow is furrowing and there isn't enough beer in this cup to help this start making sense. Hunter program? Real Godzilla??]

You're saying the world united to form a single military to combat an external threat, [he summarizes after a moment to try to analyze it.]

What is the Jaeger program?

[don't tell him what to do!!!!!]

Oh, good. [Newt would be most disappointed in Germany if he didn't know the majesty of Godzilla.]

Yep! Its immediate purpose is the protection of coastal cities on the Pacific, but a lot of nations got involved because the Kaiju are a threat to the entire world.

[When Germany asks about the Jaeger program, Newt shrugs.] Jaegers are giant fighting robots that PPDC deploys to fight Kaiju. They're controlled by two pilots through this tech that allows the pilots to sync their brains up to the machine. It's cool, but the coolest part is that they're German-made.

[Well, the coding is, anyway. That's the important part.]

Test Drive Meme #24

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