dankmemes | Test Drive Meme #8

Welcome to Hadriel's test drive, and thank you again for your interest in the game! As always, our reserves page is here, and our applications page is here! Reserves open April 24th, and apps are open May 1st.

Two quick points here as well:
1. Any thread made in Hadriel's test drive will be accepted as the sole Action Log sample in the application.
2. All threads made in the test drive can be considered game canon, either through handwaving or through a shared mental experience while coming through the Door!

Test drives will be broken up into specific god mini-events, during which your characters can see how well they fare under the watchful eye of one of the gods. Choose wisely or just simply pick 'em all, and have fun!

F E A R

SCENARIO ONE: DEAD FLESH BUFFET
[The Door brings in all that is chaotic and evil in the world. This may include you, may include the person next to you... and may include the monster behind you.

Watch out as you explore the streets of Hadriel, because you're not alone, and there's always something lurking in the shadows, waiting for the perfect chance to swarm around you and chow down. This time, the Door has brought in a group of rotfiends, from the video game The Witcher.

These unpleasant-looking creatures are necrophages, meaning they feed on the flesh of the dead, and if that flesh is in short supply they are happy to add to it. Normally found in groups, they are fast and difficult to corner. What's more, when on the verge of death, they have an annoying tendency to explode into a flammable cloud of poisonous toxins. You left your torch at home, right?]

R A G E
SCENARIO TWO: MMM WHATCHA SAY
[There you were, just walking along the street, minding your own business like a good underground hell-city citizen, when all of a sudden you saw someone. It was like love at first sight - if by 'love' you mean 'deep burning hatred'. You've never wanted to kill someone so much, and why? Well, you're not really sure, but there's probably a reason! You'll just have to figure it out. Or not. Who needs a reason for murder, anyway?

Or maybe you're the one someone else has targeted. Maybe you know they're after you and you're desperately trying to watch your back. Why do they hate you? You don't even know them. Or maybe you do, maybe they're your best friend. Either way, this is a super awkward situation, and someone might end up dead. Hopefully not you!

This is a mini version of our Assassin event this month!]

H O P E

SCENARIO THREE: SCRATCH OFF
[This morning, you received a scratch ticket in the mail (who knew Hadriel even had mail?), addressed to you. The instructions are clear enough - scratch off three matching icons, and you win a prize! Sure, okay. But here's the grand prize: a one-way ticket home.

Unfortunately, try as you might, you aren't gonna win that one, but keep hoping! And hey, just think of all the other GREAT PRIZES you could win: an inflatable duck, a plastic ring to give your sweetheart, an empty can of Red Bull, a cell phone charm shaped like a strange green creature with a boner.

So what if you didn't win that ticket home? You got something almost as good: a shitty prize! Thanks, Hope!]

Flat | Top-Level Comments Only

Thanks, but I think I'll manage.

[It's not like he's got a moral opposition to being carried, no. Heck Papyrus does it all the time. But it's something he can't afford to trust a lot of people to do, when you've got 1 HP and being jostled in the wrong way can make you slip and fall and crack your skull open and whoops, it's all over - except he doesn't get the benefit of a suspected new day slipping just around the corner. Presumably. He's not entirely sure how time works here. That hasn't been his priority just yet.]

But you're free to get us outta here.

What are we waiting here for, then?

[He gives a quick smirk, before his muscles bunch and the stool in his hands goes straight through the window with a high crash, shattering it completely to leave only shards left in the sill, before it goes rolling down away across the rocks with a loud clattering.

Bigby's already moving after the window's out, climbing carefully out so he doesn't cut himself to look around. Seemed clear, for now. Smelled clear.]

Come on!

[Yikes. All right.

Sans gathers himself up again. The brief rest he took did him some good, and he's not about to risk a leap through a broken window. So he seizes advantage of another shortcut, placing himself just outside the window.]

Looks clear.

Small mercies.

[He picks a direction that doesn't smell horrifically like poison or relish and strides away, the perfect silhouette of 'don't fucking start something with me right now' as he keeps his eyes and nose out for more monsters.

And, of course, his hands start to dig out a new cigarette.]

I hear those things are bad for you, buddy.

[Not that it really affects Sans one way or the other. He doesn't have lungs, so really, whatever. He buries his hands in his jacket pockets and keeps as steady a pace with Bigby as he can without rushing, which is a feat in and of itself seeing how much effort he's expended today.]

Hasn't killed me yet.

[And never will; he heals faster than the damage they cause. He looks around and easily spots the arena in the distance, and turns to walk away from it.]

If those monsters are coming from that colosseum, the best place to be is as far away from it as possible. If they're not, well.

[He flicks the lighter on and cups it around the smoke between his lips. He's just gonna have to keep blowing shit up then, isn't he.]

Caves're supposed to be the worst part of the city, right?

[Man, he could go for some grub right about now. Pity he doesn't have any monster food on him. Nothing but the occasional ketchup pack stashed away in his jacket.]

Pretty much swarming with things trying to kill you.

That's news to me.

[Useful, at least.]

Then we stay away from the caves. Can't be too hard.

I hear things.

[That's practically his M.O. Hearing things he shouldn't.]

So I figure, center of the city with the most buildings is safest, yeah?

[He nods in response. Good a plan as any. His pace slows slightly, enough for Sans to have an easier time keeping up.]

I'm not smelling them in this direction. They mustn't be moving far from the caves.

[If everyone's apparently crowding around those areas, why would they need to? All the food they could try to catch is right there.]

Gotta pretty good nose on you, huh?

[Shoulda figured. But he likes getting confirmation from a reliable source. i.e., Bigby himself. He shoots a look over his shoulder as he follows Bigby at a pace that can be best described as a brisk walk, even if his posture is one more suited for a leisurely stroll.]

Best in the business. But I can't exactly turn it off. [He waves the cigarette, leaving a brief silky smoke trail in the air before it goes back in his mouth.] Part of why I go through these so fast. Next best thing.

[Yep, next best thing to no sense of smell is smothering it with the shittiest cigarettes small change can buy. He's clearly a winner there.]

Don't you think you might wanna keep your nose a little open, given the, uh, circumstances?

[He doesn't wanna sound worried. But, uh...he's a little worried. Sans can handle himself in a pinch, but he'd really rather not have to. There's a difference in being able to do something and being forced into it because there's no other choice.]

Wouldn't matter either way. There's no breeze in here, so the air's stagnant. Whenever I'm smelling their poison they're either on top of us or dead.

[But in respect of Sans's nervousness, he does huff one last puff and flick the half-spent cigarette ahead of him to crush under his stride. He looks around again, and jerks a thumb at one rotfiend that's wandered into view, well out of earshot and yet to notice them.]

But they're not smart. We'll probably spot them before they get anywhere near us.

[But then again, it is his luck they're banking on for that.]

If you say so.

[He's fine being reliant on someone else for protection, even if he's got a few tricks up his sleeve that'd do in a pinch. He eyes the rotfiend and rambles along, oblivious to the presence of some very tasty potential victims.]

Don't know why they think I got meat on these bones.

[He winks.]

You wouldn't know it with the jacket on.

[That snark escaped a bit quickly, but seriously. How the hell does Sans have a belly in those clothes? Shouldn't he look like a coathanger?]

[There's no telling how a skeleton can be as chubby as Sans apparently is. Magic? Science? Smuggling half a dozen cats in his ribcage? Who can tell?

Sans laughs, a deep, amused chuckle.]

What can I say? I'm big-boned.

Well, I can safely say that I've never met someone quite like you before. In any respect.

[Everyone he knows is an asshole. Also, fleshy.]

Don't see a lotta skeletons where you are?

[Hey, that's all right. Most skeletons like to keep to themselves. Awfully shy about it, hiding in people's skin and stuff. It's a real good time.]

Humans are pretty rare where I come from. Or, uh - people who look human, anyway.

Test Drive Meme #8

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