dankmemes | test drive meme #11

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!test drive

test drive meme #11

Welcome to Hadriel's test drive, and thank you again for your interest in the game! As always, our reserves page is here, and our applications page is here! Reserves open July 25th, and apps are open August 1st.

Two quick points here as well:
1. Any thread made in Hadriel's test drive will be accepted as the sole Action Log sample in the application.
2. All threads made in the test drive can be considered game canon, either through handwaving or through a shared mental experience while coming through the Door!

Test drives will be broken up into specific god mini-events, during which your characters can see how well they fare under the watchful eye of one of the gods. Choose wisely or just simply pick 'em all, and have fun!

F E A R

SCENARIO ONE: WORKING TITLE
[The Door brings in all that is chaotic and evil in the world. This may include you, may include the person next to you... and may include the monster behind you.

Watch out as you explore the streets of Hadriel, because you're not alone, and there's always something lurking in the shadows, waiting for the perfect chance to swarm around you and chow down. This time, the Door has brought in a few Working Joes, from the Alien: Isolation video game series.

Once simply androids meant for mundane jobs, working Joes have had their programming altered to isolate and eliminate threats onboard their ship- which they now believe to be Hadriel. Super strong, yet slow and plodding, an android may ask you for identification before throttling you when you don't have the right answer. They are quite sturdy and difficult to destroy without the right tools. Have fun!]

H O P E

SCENARIO TWO: BEAUTIFICATION DUTY
[The city has always looked a little drab, but now with some tools from Hope, it's up to you guys to spruce it up a bit! Your character will find themselves in a shop filled with various paints, home improvement tools, window stickers, streamers, and various other items and tools used to improve the appearance of the neighborhood.

You're encouraged to add your own little flair to the project in order to improve living standards and make Hope the happiest god in the pantheon. So, what will you do? Paint a mural? Sweep up some rubble? Install a skylight! The cave is your oyster.

This is a mini version of our Extinction v2 event this month!]

S O R R O W

SCENARIO THREE: CRY ME A RIVER
[When you wake up in the morning, something feels... off. It feels like you just watched 20 ASPCA commercials in a row and then topped it all off with the first ten minutes of Up. You're beaten down, depressed, upset by all the horrific acts and trauma in the world, and it's enough to make you want to cry.

Turn on the waterworks, because Hadriel is about to have a shortage of tissues and everyone's getting dehydrated. You might run into your neighbor crying while you're scavenging for food, or you might just find that one whole asshole in the entire movie who isn't affected.

Either way, it's time to get some hugs, some kleenex, and maybe a little bit of chocolate. Happy... crying?]

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[Aw, kid.

He didn't really mean to spook them, but his people skills are off today. Lots of things are off today. Because he feels like absolute trash.

Thanks, Sorrow. No really, take a bow. We appreciate what you do around here, we honestly do, thank you for your participation, now kindly buzz off.]

You, uh...tryin' to sweep someone off their feet here?

[See? Jokes. It all feels very rote, though. Such is life down here.]

[Sans feels like trash, huh?

Must be another day ending in y. This time, it's accompanied by a very vague attempt at appreciating his humor; a halfhearted twitch of the lips that fails before it even begins.

Sorrow's really got it out for everyone. They'd take the time to consider what the snide little voice in the back of their head would say about that, but they're pretty sure said voice is still in bed. Shame, they might've parroted something out, just to break the awkward gap in conversation.]

I forgot my broom.

[Such a simple statement should not have the ability to make them cry harder.]

[And they don't even bat an eye. There's just kind of a vague tremor to their mouth that could be either a laugh or one of those facial subtleties that humans have, signalling an imminent breakdown. Knowing what kind of day it's been, it's probably the latter.

Sans has no idea how one is supposed to handle crying children. But here he is, standing here, feeling like the worst guy alive (har har), smiling like the kid isn't crying right in front of him, and being wholly and completely at sea as they do so.

Boy, but he knew he was the worst guy for the job, but man is he the worst guy for the job.

He paws around his jacket pockets in search of something handy. Whoopee cushion...no. Joy buzzer, definitely not. C'mon, he's gotta have a tissue or two around here somewhere, doesn't he?]

Uh.

[Wait. Yes. Score. He catches the corner of a handkerchief and pulls it out of his sleeve with a flourish. And...keeps pulling it out. A big long colorful string of them, seemingly unending, practically to the floor now, all so he can hand one end to the kid.

Like he said. Magic is real good for the rule of comedy. And sometimes that comes in handy.]

Here ya go, kiddo.

[Everyone has a breaking point. When a day is just so bad it takes one more thing to set you off; you drop a soapy dish and it cracks. You watch the world leave you behind from a dusty trail. Tumble onto a bed of bones, laid to rest in a golden hallway.

Doesn't have to be all bad. As far as black soap operas go, there's a rainbow colored lining. One that gains a wet snort from them, reaching out to accept the- handkerchief, politely attempting to collect it all back up from the ground.

Blowing their nose on it is just ridiculous enough to gain another sound, something of a guffaw, as they contemplate their life and choices and overall state of being, standing in the street with a literal armful of hankies and a very uncomfortable skeleton.]

Thanks.

[They have no idea how they're going to hand it back, but thanks.]

[Well hey, that's definitely a good reaction. Sans's grin gets a little wider, even if he feels...still more or less like he's gonna collapse from sheer emotional exhaustion at any second. At least he's used to emotional asystole - this kind of abrupt resurgence is nobody's friend.]

Tears are nothin' to sneeze at.

[Still cracking jokes. Best way to defuse tension, or...something, he supposes.]

How y'doin', kid? Aside from the whole, uh...

[Yeah, they look to be a little bit of a mess. He waves in the vague direction of their face.]

[They're hard pressed to keep their own smile on their face, if Frisk's honest with themself. Hard earned, but they're going to make it equally as hard to disappear, if they can help it. Sadness isn't everything the world is made of, and drama-

Well, there's enough drama without continuously bawling their eyes out.]

Okay.

[Adjusting. This isn't the Underground; but it's nothing like the Surface, either. There's things to get used to, like getting to sleep for more than a few hours at a time, having a place to come back to at the end of every day. Not home, but a place to come back to all the same.]

I'm trying to help.

[Trying to help. Trying to...clean stuff, apparently, even if they're obviously not feelin' up to it right now. The kid really is a trooper, he'll give them that, but do they know when to...

God, it's like the worst joke imaginable. Do they just not know when to QUIT?

He hates himself a little more for coming up with that one on the fly, and he keeps it to himself.]

Hey, s'alright, buddy. I don't think today's a day for helping. I think it's more a day for takin' it easy.

[He pulls his hands from his pockets to shrug, like he's not on the verge of a complete breakdown. His breakdowns are a little less obvious, at least, but he still doesn't want anyone being privy to 'em.]

Take it from me. I'm a professional in takin' it easy.

[Sans is a lot more emotive than people might give him credit for. There's variation to this smiles and the curvature of his eyes, and whilst Frisk might not be the best at reading him, they're at least aware that there's a change. Change is... important.

Change might be good or bad, they just- don't know. But they can hope.]

I guess so. [They don't sound too enthusiastic about that, but why is hard to explain. They know what's waiting for them when all of this is over.

Even harder to explain when they still need to go back anyway.]

...There's no, um. Grillbys? I guess?

[So if they should be taking it easy, mr professional, where and how would they even begin?]

Nah. Not down here. Just, uh...

[Well, there's the bar. But that's no place for a kid. He lets the sentence fade into silence. He can't just take a line right off the old script and say, "let's go to Grillby's." And he can't say "let's head back to my place," because there's a couple scientists constantly at each others' throats when they're not having incredibly, uh...intimate moments, and also a guy who sticks guns into people's backs if they sneak in. Not that Sans is morally opposed to that, he just doesn't feel like that might be the best place for a kid.

So!

Moving on!]

There's some shops and the like. But not a lot of 'em are all that good for takin' a load off. I'd say we should head back to my place, but the roomies can be kind of a lot to take in all at once.

[Silence speaks volumes. This city isn't equipped to deal with kids, a fact that makes the lead in their stomach drop just a little deeper, a twisting sense of guilt that has them swallowing the apology on the tip of their tongue. It's really not their fault that they're here, even if they are in the way.

Hastily, they busy themself with the rainbow of hankies again, just to keep from being that much more...obtrusive.]

...Guess we're don't really have anywhere.

[...Maybe that's something they can work on. Even if they're not supposed to be working.]

[Wrong thing to say.

Boy, he's really crap at this, isn't he? Just has...no idea how to handle a kid being in the position this kid's in. They're fumbling with their own body, trying to take up as little space as possible even if it's just the two of them standing in the middle of an empty underground street.

He can't even really argue with that. They're not wrong. That's what's killing him. At this particular moment in time, anyway.]

Well, hey. We can make a somewhere. You stayin' anywhere right now?

We can.

[In fact, his vocal affirmation of the thought makes it less of a concept and more of a requirement. A space for them; they can do that. Frisk straightens, slightly, shoulders drawing up with something to preoccupy their mind. A space-]

With people.

[A shrug. The less said about it, the better.]

...Are we allowed to take space?

'Course we are. Gods wouldn't drag us here if we weren't, right?

[He says it with considerably more confidence than he has, popping a cheery wink in the kid's direction. No reason to wallow in his own garbage if the other kid's already feeling like garbage, right? Yeah. Probably not.

He's usually better at maintaining a cheerful façade than this. He's gonna fork the blame over to Sorrow with renewed vigor.]

There's rooms in the Spires, and Delight's got some housing - though you might get some roomies for the bigger spaces.

[Well that's something, they suppose. It's not a park; it's not even something that would really prove to have much fun behind it at all, but... a safe space? They could both use that.

Sans looks like he could use that.]

Okay.

[I'll look into it. It doesn't quite help them now, but-

The idea of a safe space at all is a fairly new concept.]

[Heh, look at them. Regular pair of functioning messes, aren't they? It's not perfect, but things seldom are.]

How 'bout we take a look at one of those Spires, huh? There's beds, stuff to eat. You can have a regular ol' ball there.

[Look, he can't just in good faith leave them here and expect it to play out just fine. They're a stern kid, sure, but they're also one of the few things left over from home. He has nothing else. And now that he knows there's a separation between them and the other one -

It ain't perfect. It ain't even a little bit ideal. But he can't lose this. Not this last thing.]

I even know a shortcut.

[Gosh, with friends like these, who needs enemies? Another twitch of their lips; if the beds in those Spires are anything like the ones at the MTT Resort, then sure. They can have an absolute ol' ball.

They don't even have to be alone to do it. It's an extra bonus, one padded with too much unsaid that probably never will.

Calmly, Frisk reaches over and hooks their fingers into the fabric of his jacket. They're ready, captain.]

[They don't grab his hand, but just go ahead and latch onto his jacket instead. Maybe that makes sense. He's not really sure where they came from, temporally speaking - and wow, nice job Sans, this is the first you've thought of that, huh?

Yeesh. No wonder this kid ends up in those scrapes half the time. Yeah, really did a bang-up job protecting them.

Anyway.

Sans doesn't offer much warning, but one second they're in one place and the next they're in another. He just blips the pair of 'em right over to one of the Spires, practically on its doorstep.]

People just more or less pick their own place to live down here. This one looks like it's got some unoccupied rooms.

[They'll never get used to the feeling of their stomach dropping out when seemingly, they haven't budged an inch. Yet here they are anyway, on the curb next to one of the few buildings about the place that actually looks new.

The distinction between the spires and their neighbors borders on painful.]

So we just have to pick one?

[Frisk's brow furrows, gripping his jacket tightly for a few moments longer... then letting go.

About those 'roommates'.]

We- can we have three beds?

[Roommate.]

[There's something about the tightness of their grip, and then the swiftness with which they release it that's...disconcerting. He can't put his phalanx on it. He's not sure how much the kid knows, or remembers about him. There's code-words and secret code-words and secret secret code-words but he's not sure he should go there. At least not yet.]

Yep. Just settle in wherever. Not really sure if there's a whole lotta other kids here - I've met one so far, but I think he's roomin' with his brother. And there's, uh...

['Course, there's also the other one. He scratches the back of his cervical vertebrae with one hand, like he's nervous or somethin'. Weird.]

Well, people just kinda pick where they go.

[They take note of his response; there's, uh...

Uh. Chara would probably respond to that name. Come when it's called. There's a joke in there somewhere, but Frisk can't think of what it is.

It's going to be a problem, if they try to room with both of them.]

Do you like your roommates?

Yeah, they're all right. Couple'a scientists, a real friendly guy named Wade. Got a real nice appreciation for bad jokes.

[He chuckles, with marginally less than his usual cheerful gusto.]

People pick who they live with. You're a real nice kid, [actually, he has no idea how nice they are since that kind of depends on the state of their SOUL but he's not going there just yet] and I could probably help ya find someone to settle in with. If you want.

[He's not precisely opting to live with them, then, but they've already made their mind up about that.

Is it better that he's making this so much easier on them? They don't know. In the absence of a booming, cheerful voice, a hot dog stand, or a long, golden corridor, there's a distance there that could almost be construed as uncomfortable, a fraction of hesitation between words spoken as the script falls away and two people struggle to build a new one.]

I know who to stay with.

[Whether or not it's better, it is easier. That's probably the thought that counts the most.]

That's, uh...that's good. That's real good.

[He didn't expect such a decisive answer right away, but this kid is a, uh, well, they can take care of themself, and they're a decisive kid. Thing is, he kinda made a promise and all. Not that he could very well keep it, even when he was just standin' back and lettin' the kid take the heat for almost everything - Undyne, Alphys, Mettaton, heck, even his bro, who's pretty damn strong even if he couldn't bring himself to hurt a fly.]

If you're sure.

Yeah, I'm sure.

[As sure as they ever are; given a path and set down it with all the single-mindedness that goes with gritted teeth and a thud in their chest. There's just a little more direction to go with than they've had before; something they can do and work on that could help.

A safe space.

As far as they're concerned, Sans has already done more than enough- it's more than they've ever expected or asked of him. And the smile they aim at his face may be small, but it reflects a certain amount of gratitude, all the same.]

Thank you.

[Promises are hard. He's doing his best, all the same.]

['S weird, hearin' them thank him like this. Him helping them. Ha-ha, hey, look lady - he's keeping his promise. Bit late in the game to be doing a thing like that, but look at that, he's fulfilling that obligation.

Looking after 'em. They're...well, they're a tough kid, he knows that. Tough enough to grind out a path where none should exist. And he's not sure he can forgive them for that. Not sure if they deserve that.

But then, there's a lot he'd need to ask them before he can make that kind of decision.]

Hey, don't sweat it, kid. And if you got any questions, uh -

[Delight's housing, House Number One. Not terribly difficult to figure out where he lives.

He thinks about a kid going through whatever personal crisis kids go through and having nowhere else to turn.

He also thinks about coming home to three dead roommates.]

Well, you should have a phone on ya somewhere with everyone's contacts already listed.

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save_theworld - 2016-08-21 13:25 (UTC) - Expand

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skelebro - 2016-08-21 18:22 (UTC) - Expand

Flat | Top-Level Comments Only

test drive meme #11

you say that like you don't already kill me on a regular basis

R u d e what have I ever done to you (don't answer that)

[shifty eyes]

jfc

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