dankmemes | test drive meme #12

Welcome to Hadriel's test drive, and thank you again for your interest in the game! As always, our reserves page is here, and our applications page is here! Reserves open August 25th, and apps are open September 1st.

Two quick points here as well:
1. Any thread made in Hadriel's test drive will be accepted as the sole Action Log sample in the application.
2. All threads made in the test drive can be considered game canon, either through handwaving or through a shared mental experience while coming through the Door!

Test drives will be broken up into specific god mini-events, during which your characters can see how well they fare under the watchful eye of one of the gods. Choose wisely or just simply pick 'em all, and have fun!

F E A R

SCENARIO ONE: O SHIT WADDUP
[The Door brings in all that is chaotic and evil in the world. This may include you, may include the person next to you... and may include the monster behind you.

Watch out as you explore the streets of Hadriel, because you're not alone, and there's always something lurking in the shadows, waiting for the perfect chance to hop right on you and chow down. This time, the Door has brought in several Doomed, from the Final Fantasy XI video game.

These strange undead creatures look somewhat froglike in appearance, but rumor has it they're actually made from a bunch of gross dead bodies all stuck together. Their whiplike tongue can hurt pretty bad, and if that wasn't enough, they can emit gasses that make it hard to concentrate, fight, and even stand upright. Have fun!]

SCENARIO TWO: PARANOIA
[Out of nowhere, you received a message on your phone. It's most likely from an unknown number - but not necessarily. It could be from someone you know, a number you recognize. A friend, an enemy, a trusted ally. But it's not who the message is from that matters, it's what it says.

Listen to me. They've been lying to you this whole time, and now they're coming for you. That, and nothing else.

So what will you do? Laugh and ignore this clearly missent text? Text back, try to get more details? Freak out? Or maybe you already know what it's talking about - who it's talking about. Maybe it's talking about that person who just walked by you. Didn't they look at you for a little too long? Doesn't it look like they might have a weapon?

You've got to protect yourself in whatever way you can. Who knows what they're plotting.]

C O M B I N A T I O N

SCENARIO THREE: LOUD VALLEY
[There you were, walking down one of Hadriel's rubble-strewn streets, when out of nowhere a cheery tune played. And then... everything changed.

Now there are rainbows along the cave ceiling, candy in the shops, walls painted in bright colors. Everything is cheery and happy and designed to lighten your heart. And if you walk around, you may just find your very own animal companion waiting to frolic and play with you! Sure, it'll all change back to normal Hadriel before long, but right now you might as well enjoy it.

This is a mini version of our Loud Valley event this month!]

Flat | Top-Level Comments Only

[It's fine. Animals love him. This chicken definitely won't hurt him.]

Yeah, okay, but it has? So we might as well enjoy it!

[And anyway--]

You can't pick up an animal and then look down at me for eating the candy, you can't have it both ways.

[The chicken gives him a look like: bitch. So she might hurt him. Maybe. A little.]

Technically, she's the one who decided to start following me around. I had no choice about this. Anyway, I'm not looking down on you.

[Mmmmm . . .]

[Yeah, okay, buddy. To that, Polnareff has no verbal response, simply an auditory one: he blows a bubble in his gum and pops it, the noise satisfyingly loud.]

Want some candy, then?

[Well, that's one of the most obnoxious things in the universe. Made more obnoxious because it's Polnareff, who is an expert at heightening annoyance to an art form. Abdul rolls his eyes and holds his hand out.]

You won't leave it alone until I eat some, will you?

Probably not!

[He says it cheerfully enough. Polnareff digs into his pocket and tugs out the first thing he grabs, which is: a mini chocolate bar. One of those fun-sized ones, you know? It has nuts in it.]

You gonna name her?

[The chicken, he means, and he nods his head towards her.]

[Are the nuts a Stand? He inspects the chocolate bar. It's sealed, but that doesn't mean anything. After an inspection that may be drawn out just to irritate Polnareff, he sighs and opens it. Here, take this wrapper.]

Of course I am. Unless you want to.

[She gives him another Look.]

[On any day but today, he'd complain about that wrapper. What is he, a trash bin? But he's too eager to see Abdul eat something that isn't good for him to bother.]

I think she'll try to peck out my eyes if I do.

[But then:]

Madonna.

[He's very nearly ready to put the offending candy in his mouth, but then he just snorts, while the hen in question peers at him suspiciously.]

Why that, of all things?

Why not? Your other ones were like . . . Prince and Bowie and all that, right? So why not Madonna?

That's not a very good reason.

[It's a decent reason, but consider: a better one.]

What, you've got a better name in mind?

[He continues the not-argument easily, but there's a serene quality to his tone. Nothing can possibly annoy him today. Quite possibly nothing will annoy him for the entire week, or month, or year. He has Abdul back, and so everything is all right in the world.]

[Polnareff really has recovered quickly, hasn't he. From yesterday and the day before and the forty-nine days before that. There's an emotional elasticity to the man that's either very admirable or very worrying. Either way:]

I might. I might not. But I'm not even going to consider yours unless you come up with something better than "it fits a pattern".

I'm just saying, that's pretty rich from a guy who doesn't even have another name in mind . . .

[He squints at her. She glares back, and Polnareff takes a step back.]

She's got the hairstyle thing going. All that fluff? Same thing.

Ah, of course.

[Hmm. He looks at the hen, who seems honestly pretty all right with this turn of events, then back at Polnareff.]

Are you scared of Madonna? The singer, I mean.

I'm not scared of your chicken!

[He's definitely leery of it, though.]

It's a chicken. What's there to be scared of? They can't even fly.

I was asking about the singer.

[But he was implying some shit too though. He scratches the hen on the head.]

She could peck your eyes out if she wanted to.

You were asking about the singer, but you were gonna bring up the chicken.

[He glares at both of them, one after the other.]

Anyway, you could say that about anything. That dog I was playing with before could've bit my throat out, but it didn't. You could choke on that chocolate, but you probably won't. She could peck my eyes out, but she won't.

test drive meme #12

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