Test Drive Meme #33

[hadrielmods]

Welcome to Hadriel's test drive, and thank you again for your interest in the game! As always, our reserves page is here, and our applications page is here! Reserves open June 24th, and apps are open July 1st. Please remember that there is an app cap of 20 apps.

Two quick points here as well:

1. Any thread made in Hadriel's test drive will be accepted as the sole Action Log sample in the application.
2. All threads made in the test drive can be considered game canon, either through handwaving or through a shared mental experience while coming through the Door!

Test drives will be broken up into specific god mini-events, during which your characters can see how well they fare under the watchful eye of one of the gods. Choose wisely or just simply pick 'em all, and have fun!

F E A R

SCENARIO ONE: WEARS HIGH HEELS WHEN SHE EXERCISES
[The Door brings in all that is chaotic and evil in the world. This may include you, may include the person next to you... and may include the monster behind you.

And this one is, well, particularly creepy. Especially if you dislike body horror, or spiders, or being eaten. This time, the Door has brought in Virginias, from the video game The Forest.

Virginias are rather disturbing-looking monsters, looking a bit like multiple bodies all squished together. They move quickly, they can charge and leap at you, and those creepy arms and legs hurt like hell. They also make skittering noises, if you want to be even more creeped out. So have fun with that!]

L O V E

SCENARIO TWO: YES, LIKE THAT
[Today, it's you time. You woke up this morning and you knew it was the perfect day to practice a little self-care. To put yourself first. To treat yourself. And that's what you're going to do!

Whether that means drinking too much, skipping out on unwanted obligations, telling people what you really think of them, or eating that last donut - you're looking after you now, and it doesn't matter what anybody else thinks! All that matters is that you're happy. So party on, and let's hope your fun doesn't get in the way of anyone else's life.

This is a mini version of our Love Yourself event this month.]

R A G E

SCENARIO THREE: JUST ONE OF THOSE DAYS
[This morning you didn't wake up wanting to treat yourself. Oh, no. You woke up wanting to show your anger - to the world, to yourself, to anyone watching. You want to break shit, start fights, get into pointless internet arguments. They're wrong, after all.

So why not? Find a stray piece of wood and start smashing windows. Tell someone you don't like the way they're looking at you. Post something incendiary on Twitter Hadriel's network. And wait for the responding anger. That's what you want, right? Someone to face off against?

Let's just hope you don't go too far.]

Comments

[hyperverbose]

[ i mean not... un... true either ]

Nobody got hurt. Right? [ raising his voice, he turns to the crowd: ] Nobody's hurt. [ he turns back to peter, forgetting to lower his volume again: ] See? Nobody's... everything's fine. [ and he's just gonna ... slump back against the counter and start sliding down ]

[itsnotaonesie]

[Peter will just. Stand here and watch.

And judge silently. Just a little bit.]

...Do you want a glass of water or something?

[hyperverbose]

If it has vodka in it.

[ tony, no ]

[itsnotaonesie]

You're getting water. With water in it. Just. Sit there a minute.

[Peter's had some weird days lately, maybe a few terrible ones, but this was by far the stupidest. It was at least in his top five.

He leaves long enough to grab the poor, drunk bastard a glass of water, crouching next to him when he returns with it. He's just gonna hover here and make sure Tony doesn't spill the glass all over himself.]

Here, drink this before your liver dies.

[hyperverbose]

[ fine, fine, he'll drink the water. and just... not go anywhere else right now. this is what self love looks like, tony stark style. pretty sad, really. ]

You know, I wouldn't have pegged you for all these strong maternal instincts.

[itsnotaonesie]

[Mr. Stark no you're doing it very wrong. This is the wrongest way you could possibly love yourself.]

It's less maternal instincts, and more the fact that I'm the only sober guy in the room and can see that this is getting out of hand. So, I'm cutting you off, and if you have a problem with that I'll web your hands to your butt.

[He will absolutely do it]

[hyperverbose]

[ he's a shrink's nightmare, what can he say

he purses his lips at the threat, brow furrowing, as he drunkenly mumbles: ]

This is the thanks I get for all the... high-grade mentoring...? Top notch, even. Priceless. [ he grudgingly gulps down more water ]

Kids these days.

[itsnotaonesie]

[Peter almost regrets the fact that he didn't think to get his phone out to record whiny drunk Tony Stark. Almost.]

If I wasn't grateful on some level, I would have probably just left you here to pass out on the floor. And then drawn something on your face. You'll notice that I'm doing neither of these things.

You wanna get off the floor, or are you good down there for now?

[hyperverbose]

Think I'm good. As floors go, this one's pretty ergonomic. [ not remotely true. he pats the ground next to him. ] C'mon. Have a seat.

[itsnotaonesie]

I'm surprised you can even pronounce "ergonomic" right now.

[The last thing Peter wants to do right now is sit on this floor. There could be like. Glass shards and spilled booze on it.

He decides to just humor Drunky Stark though, and shifts around to sit on the floor next to him.]

Guess I've sat on worse floors.

[Probably not true.]

[hyperverbose]

One time I sat on Kanye's floor. [ is that even remotely true? we just don't know ] I'd give this one a solid five.

You know... [ he swings the arm that's holding his glass of water around peter casually, gesturing down ] I bet I could build a voice-activated floor.

[itsnotaonesie]

[I mean it's Tony Stark. There's like a 50/50 chance that it's true. It wouldn't surprise Peter if it was]

Yeeeeah, don't know if I'd sit on that floor. Kim Kardashian's probably sat on that floor.

[Aaand now this is a thing. He's maybe half listening because he is now paying very close attention to where that glass of water is. Just maybe try not to spill that, Mr. Stark.]

If anyone could build a voice-activated floor, it's probably you. What would you even do with a voice-activated floor? Like, besides walk on it.

[hyperverbose]

Instant disco. [ duh ]

[itsnotaonesie]

Sounds a little impractical. What about one of those conveyer belt floors, like in airports?

[hyperverbose]

Why not both? [ the tony stark slogan ]

Tagging at work like a responsible adult dont mind me

[itsnotaonesie]

Okay, I guess I can't argue with that. You think the world is ready for a disco belt, though? Sounds a little extreme.

I am honored by your ninja tags

[hyperverbose]

Innovation lives in that space where the world might not be ready. [ check out these drunken words of wisdom. there should be a surcharge. ] That way progress lies. [ he is saying this very solemnly for a man talking about a disco conveyor belt ]

[itsnotaonesie]

[Peter nods slowly, as if this is like the deepest, most inspirational shit he's ever heard. Under different circumstances, maybe it would be]

So... exactly how much did you have to drink, Mr. Stark?

[hyperverbose]

[ his brow furrows the tiniest bit, as he apparently tries to calculate ] ... I stopped counting around nine.

[itsnotaonesie]

[How is this man not blacked out in a corner somewhere HOW]

Wh- Nine?

Like, okay. I don't drink, but I'm pretty sure that maybe that's way too much? You're gonna be so hung over tomorrow.

[hyperverbose]

[ it's the iron liver ]

Wouldn't be a party otherwise.

[itsnotaonesie]

[He's gonna need an iron liver if this keeps up. And maybe iron kidneys.]

Uh huh. Five bucks says you won't even remember this party in the morning. Or much of anything else.

[hyperverbose]

Therein lies the point, Scooter.

[itsnotaonesie]

That's... uh.

I mean, that's not... really the best way to like...

Maybe talking about it would better than like. Poisoning yourself?

[hyperverbose]

Right. [ he pats peter's shoulder with paternal affection. almost missing, but finding it eventually, as he suddenly remembers that maybe he shouldn't be advising the teenager to turn to alcoholism. ] Caveat for all future encounters like this: do as I say, not as I do.