the | in character | critique meme

[dedikated]

Have you ever just wanted to tell someone flat-out what you think of them as a person? Does your roommate have this one quirk that drives you up the wall, like dripping apathy all over the kitchen sink? Sometimes all it takes to be the best person you can be is a dose of self-awareness, sometimes what it takes instead is a cluebat to the head... and sometimes they just have a stupid name you can never quite spell right.

For all this and more, have I got the meme for you!

THE LOWDOWN
i. Post a header with your character's name.
ii. Comment in-character to other people's headers. With what? Depends on your CR! Maybe they're a good person and really should keep on keeping on, maybe literally everyone can see they need to suck it up and confess already, maybe they'll change their wicked ways if just one extra person casts aspersions on their pompadour. Bring in examples if you want, as with any helpful critique. Be as creative as you like!
iii. Other characters will comment to yours, no doubt overflowing with well-meaning advice on how to be the best person they can be. Your character is free to respond. Excuse you, maybe despair is still in fashion??
iv. A probably unnecessary reminder, but just remember, this is not a place for OOC crit! There are other, more appropriate channels for that.
v. Here are quick links to the Dreamwidth inbox and recent posted comments page if you want them.

Shamelessly borrowed from empatheias

Comments

Damen

[barbarus]

[dogsanddaughters]

You're super tall and nice to me. Can I braid your hair sometime?

[barbarus]

Braid it?

[ He's clearly amused. ]

The men and women of Vask braid their hair. I had never thought of it. But for you, I would allow it. I'm fond of you already.

[dogsanddaughters]

Yay! I'll make it look really cool. [There may or may not be bows involved.] Is Vask where you're from?

[barbarus]

Akielos.

[ He smiles at her. ]

But I traveled through the Vaskian mountains, with Laurent. I met many of their people. They're nomads, but fierce warriors.The braids help.

[dogsanddaughters]

I never seen a mountain before. [Actually she's never been on real ground before. But that's a different story.] Laurent's your boyfriend, right? And how do the braids help them?

[barbarus]

[ Damen briefly pictures Laurent's probable reaction to the word 'boyfriend', and grins. ]

He's my lover. We were on our way to the border between our countries, and those mountains lined the route. They're vast, but I grew up atop high cliffs. I think you'd like them.

The braids are a cultural thing, they mark them out as Vaskian. They're known to be strong warriors. Reputation always helps.

[dogsanddaughters]

[Miriam nods.] Thought so. Are cliffs made of, ummm...sand-stone? I think that's what it's called. I saw pictures in a book one time.

And I've seen stuff like that, with the braids. Like the Sons wear masks and the burners have special armor, and the hookers on Barker Street the special hair-dos. So you know who they are.

[barbarus]

Some are. But the cliffs of Ios are limestone, sheer and white, and the palace stands on the top. A white city, fortified by the sea. When I was a boy, I would look out over those waters and hear the rocks breaking away and crashing miles below.

[ That’s the sound of home.

He has been away for a long time. Too long, in truth. ]

Burners and hookers? [ More terms he doesn’t know. ]

[dogsanddaughters]

[Wow. Damen grew up by the ocean. Listening to it heave and crash. Miriam rocks back on her feet, wanting desperately to ask what it was like - was the salt really so strong you could taste it, feel it crunch between your teeth? - but doesn't. You have to be careful asking about home. Sometimes it's just gone, or people can't go back. Miriam just smiles for him.] That's really cool. I've never seen anything like that. Not yet, anyway.

[There's time. And she's going to fly when she's bigger.]

It's just a nickname. Burners work for the Inferno Corps. [Miriam rolls her eyes.] They're all nuts, but they fight the Sons. We call 'em burners since they set stuff on fire. They got lotsa napalm and their armor's all fireproof. Fwooom!

[Miriam doesn't like the burners all that much - they're not right in the head, none of them - but they don't bother her much.]

And hookers are prostitutes! You know, you give 'em money and they give you a good time.

[Miriam nods sagely. She knows a lot of prostitutes.]

[barbarus]

[ She's never seen mountains, and she's never seen the sea. Damen takes this in, but finds himself wondering what Miriam's home is like. Perhaps she's from flatlands. ]

It's a worthy sight. What is it like where you are from? Rivers, instead of the sea?

[ That's his assumption, anyway. As for napalm, that's another word that means little to him, but at least he understands the context. Inferno Corps. An interesting thought. The prostitutes, on the other hand, make his face clear. ]

Oh, whores. [ He does not know many, but he knows more than he used to. Adventuring with Laurent is an Experience. Damen lifts an eyebrow at her. ] 'Hookers' is a strange name. You can't be old enough for that company.

[dogsanddaughters]

Nothing like that. Echo Six is, uh...well, it's all metal. Lots of pipes and steam. [How does one explain a space station to a man who doesn't know about gunpowder? This is the question. Miriam considers this.] I guess you could call it a really big ship, except it doesn't move.

[Miriam huffs.] 'course I am! I room with Gilly lots. Sometimes with Barrow, too. They're nice to me.